Beauty Has A Price

I am apprehensive about the impending examinations next week. I am fervently revising my notes and attempting to absorb the mathematics formulas like a sponge. I don't wish to falter in my studies. I may not be the incandescent student of the bunch, but i reckon i am able to live with the fact of bordering on average. Everything is get-go from two weeks ago, where i embarked on a rigorous regimen of studying. The Hari Raya celebrations does not faze me a bit. The mood for revelry has certainly abated with affrightful examinations in tandem of the event.

Nothing much transpired over the week. Aside from entertaining guests and prepping for the big test, i have indulged in retail therapy and buying heaps of t-shirts from NewUrbanMales.com. I am unsure why i am besotted with this label, but i figure the cutting and how the t-shirt fits one to a T speaks a damn lot. I have been buying t-shirts from so many other brands but more than often, the sleeves were too short, the colours were unkind on the skin, it does not hug your figure nicely and it does not complement your body shape. It's a whole new level with NUM. It is affordable, it befits the image of an urban male that i want to portray, it can come off as aesthetically-pleasing, it is unassuming, i am comfortable when clad in one and the brand is also associated with class and a dollop of sexiness. Can i say BVOOMZ? :)

Anyways, i am going to grab the Singapore Calendar Guys 2010, which is going to hit the stands next week. No, i am not idol-worshipping the calendar boys. It is more of an inspiration poster that motivates me to live healthy, stay healthy, and look healthy. Like it or not, reality bites. A good physique will always be the quintessential image that will please everyone. I want to be able to look as awesome as the models. I am far from lean, toned and buffed at the moment, but surely an ambitious boy like me can peek at the calendar now and then for some inspiration? Before you gravitate towards the idea of me being so gay in wanting men's calendar, whoever said they are exclusively for the other gender?

Yeah, i have those FHM calendar babes too, but what can i do with it? Dream of sleeping with any one of them or using it as a tool for self-gratification purposes?

Calendar Guys 2010

I cannot wait for the crowning of The New Paper New Face 2009 girl. I have been following the contest since primary school and it always amazes me the standard and quality of the girls grew by leaps and bounds from year to year. They will surely give any Miss Singapore Universe/World contestants a run for their money. I can easily rattle off the winners from the past - Julia Hodgekinson, Mariam Daskalopolou, Miriam Wright, Sophie Willocq, Katrina McCrindle, Nargis Musawwir, Shahirah Price...Funny how most of the winners from the millenium on are all muslim ladies who are of mixed parentage? However, my bet this year is going to be on Amelia Bones, Victoria Bradbury, Collette Caire Miles or Adelina Eliza. If you're aint of a mixed breed, you ain't the queen. :)

Pick 2, 6, 15 and 19

The other much-anticipated event in my calendar list is Mister Singapore 2009. Like The New Paper New Face contest, i have been keeping tabs on the the event for as long as i can remember. I don't know if i will be attending the finals next week. I am half-desperate to go because i am a pageant freak. Unlike New Face's event, whose tickets are not for sale and by-invitation-only, tickets can be easily obtained. The hitch is who can i go with and whether time permits. As you know, my hands are full in the forthcoming weeks...

The exclusive DVDs of the event that were not released commercially...Thanks to Men(yep, that is the production member's actual name) for the awesome DVDs...

Still on a beauty quest, America's Next Top Model Cycle 13 is already into its 5th episode. I am not going to spoil it for you but as the picture would tell you, Tyra Banks has dedicated the whole season and giving the opportunities for short models to pit themselves against cookie-cutter tall ones. I caught the show via YouTube and i am disappointed. It could be just me but i find short girls unattractive. I want a woman's woman. Being short is offensively a handicap i guess. And i am not enjoying Cycle 13. Bitches are aplenty on the show but being short, is just what it is. Just short on quality and becomes a shortfall of it all. What a boo. (hey Tyra, how about disabled models for cycle 14?)

Yes, book 'em & have them thrown to jail. What a disgrace...

And last but not the least, everyone is having a field day deriding a certain beauty queen for her abysmal diction and deplorable pronounciation of her language communication skills. I simply cannot comprehend how is this twit even going to represent Singapore when she sounds incoherent, less-than-articulate and come across as a blabbering idiot. I was forgiving when i realised the magnitude of her pathetic interview and how the whole population lambasted her for being unable to speak properly, let alone with class that befit a beauty queen. But it was her sordid criminal past overturned my sympathy into ire. She had a criminal record for the love of God. Never in the history of pageants a former criminal is allowed to take part.

If participants can be FORCED to drop-out due to exposed history of being married, having children, did nude photography and whatnot, i don't see why she should ever be given an opportunity and be excluded from the penalty. It is not like a 'moment of folly' single crime that was commited. But one that saw her being charged for more than 60 counts.

But the latest report on her insistence in retaining her crown and still headstrong in wanting to represent at the world's stage left me befuddled. She could have concede defeat graciously and pass on the crown to her second best. I don't know what to make of this. On one hand, a beauty pageant like the Miss World/Universe is supposed to confer the crown to a beauty queen who is intelligent, ambitious, possess an aura and feminine charm, one who have desire to make an impact with her community and country, display a gentle and demure disposition and someone who is impossibly graceful.

On the other, we should be forgiving and give a chance to people with a sorry past to turn their background as an educational tool and hope to inspire others to change for the better. But in this scenario, should this certain Ms Low ever go on to win the Miss World title, what will the world think of us? The fact that we have a shortage of smart and beautiful pool of beauties that we have to resort to send in candidate with a shocking past? I can only imagine the reverberating ripples.

To Ms Low, for your own interest, please step down graciously, lar. The biggest crime was you lied in your application form before you entered Miss Singapore. Period. We can overlook the crime-thingy but we don't want no lyin' & cheatin' queen. You no play fair one. Period.

And so your dream goes BOOMZ. Wake up and smell the teh-c already, heartland girl.

Festival Market

Lights. Camera. Action.

I assume in every muslim household, the whole family is busy prepping for the big day later today. From the cooking worthy of a king's feast to the arrangement of festive kuehs, it truly is a celebration. Mother is the grand master chef and i believe right now she is still cooking up a storm for the guests arrival later in the late morning.

Don't ask me why i am fixated to the computer. I am running away from the housework. I don't know in what area will i be useful in. For all i know, i have never touched any home tools, good at cutting vegetables or in the kitchen for that matter, and help around with the cleaning of the house. I am bad at it. No, i am not behaving like a prince. I just don't like getting any part of me wet, dirty, sweaty and in grime. I just like to stay comfortable, clean, fresh and scent-smelling.

I am not really anticipating to go house-visiting in the afternoon. Because i am worn out since the whole of yesterday. The lack of sleep can turn me into a grouch and i will whine incessantly. I can easily snap when something is not in sync with my thoughts, emotion and situation. The roads better be clear from congestion and there better be parking lots available to whichever house the family is visiting. Anyways, how apt for my parents to pick the colour black for the baju kurung?

What else can be done during the house-visits? Same old shit stories will be exchanged. You eat the same cookies crap the previous house has served you, you are being force-fed out of formality's sake, the dizzying effect of the multi-hued walls of the many houses, the fcuking annoying 'Where are you working now?' conversation piece, the fake air kisses, the 'come see how fcuking cute is my newborn' topic, the crazy navigation in finding relatives' address whose street you never knew existed, trying your best to clarify that you are EDDIE and not your siblings for the fcuking trillion times to your relatives who keep forgetting who you are and entertaining the bloody kaypoh relatives who wanders around your house and checking the rooms like they are some mediums exorcising your rooms from some spirits.

And another. Lucky i drive. Pity those who don't. Or else it will be terribly 'kesian' should a family dressed in a uniformed 'green' or 'pink' baju kurungs step into an MRT and people may think they have just completed filming the latest season of Sesame Street or looked like they have just attended the pink parade. Sure, the burst of colours are fascinating to look at, but stick to the lighter tones ok. But it's okay i guess. You can wear it during hari raya 'thru Halloween. Budget mah.

I also hate it when during house-visits, people will promptly play some comedy DVDs and melodramatic Indonesian dramas. For God's sake. I don't have the whole year with you. Neither am i here for pyjamas party. Stick to the re-runs Suria Channel is playing. Or else i will get bored and go check out your rooms. You want?

Please ensure your tiny brats don't run around the house when i come. Or i will whack him with my Samsung Omnia 2. And don't repeat yourself for me to eat, eat and eat. I get it, i LOVE your spring rolls, you fcuk. Or something might have tasted funky. That's why i didn't. Maybe your 'obit' curtain colour or that grinning fugly spinster daughter of yours peeking behind the bedroom shut my appetite? Haha...

But i love Hari Raya, lar. I can play dress up and show irritating relatives what a mighty handsome young man i've grown to be. And no, i am not married and i am not seeing some ITE student damnit. Waaaa...

Oh dear, i've talked alot haven't i? And please, one last request.....Friends, DO NOT send me rehashed sms messages, that i've seen before six milleniums ago. And it makes it seem you are saying the same things like everyone did. Cheers to a fabulous holiday and stay off the sodas 'aite?!

Plastic kisses now...Muackzzz!

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri
Maaf Zahir Dan Batin
-Buat semua rakan-rakan dan kenalan Muslim saya-

Halalkan makan minum Eddie Yusoff, ye?

(Forgive me for things the i've said & done - Applicable to those whom i've offended. Life is too short. Don't hate me just 'cos i'm handsome. Kidding:)))

Life In Digits

Go Figure

2 Diplomas in the fields of Mass Communication & Police Studies(undertaking) is what i majored in

12 BFFs i trust my life whole-heartedly

23 is the age when i bought my first car

14 the first time i fall in love

26 is the age of the woman whom i fell for

4 the number of times i took my driving test

32 is the planned age for me to complete my Degree

4 years i spent with the Singapore Police Force

2 mobile phone i currently own - Samsung Omnia II & Nokia E63

0 the times i lost a mobile phone

3 times a week i engage in my run

2 to 3 weeks once i go and get my haircut

1 the only person i truly and entirely loved with my heart broke up with me days before my birthday

3 the number of email accounts that i owned

5000+ the number of mp3s in my music library

5 the years i have abstained from consuming red meat and soda/carbonated drinks

3175 my lucky car plate number, which always appeared as the winning number for 4D

21 is the age i first started working

1 the only job i ever worked in - Singapore Police Force

500 is the number of cds in my collection

450 the number of contacts in my phone

8 the age i discovered what sex & masturbation were

6 the number of swimming trunks i own

5 the minutes i give someone to make a good first impression or else i 'll shoo them off from my elite & uncaring face

15,000 the amount i loaned from my mom & dad

0 is the chance i give to someone to set things right & explain themselves if they have offended, hurt or degrade me

12 hours i spend on the internet a day

2 hours are spent on watching TV a day

0 is the number of time i smoke/drink

2,000+ is the ideal salary for my future job

Touch The Sky

The Graduate. Wee!

My Diploma in Mass Communication has been awarded. Patiently waiting for another - Diploma in Police Studies, from Temasek Polytechnic. Then off i scoot to pursue my B.A, apply to be a teacher or a journalist and then, will i even entertain ideas of settling down. Anyone who wants to marry me has got to wait for another SIX years at least, ok. Wakakakaka...

The Spirit, The Soul & Human

I am good. Thank you my dear friends. You have borrowed me your ears, shoulders and mind to help me overcome my woe-begone in quick succession. I am immensely grateful for your continuing support and render me the warmest of solace in every way you could think of. The Facebook shoutout posts, by msn, by phone calls & texts, the meet-ups and what-have-you technological means to convey your comforting words are very much appreciated.

I am picking up the pieces and rebuilding my life. No, i am not suffering from an ailment, bankruptcy, family tragedy or degenerating my morals and buckled under the forbidden realms of crime. Rather, an evanescent union between my partner and i are superglued shut for nary a scant for resolvement and it has also produced numerous cracks which are beyond repair. I don't know what the future has in store for me. I don't wish to pin any hope that my partner would make a loyal comeback into my life. Because the higher you climb, the harder the fall.

I have retreated to my own little bubble and embark on a process of self-discovery through innocuous & stupendous encounters and priceless life experiences. And the journey continues through the words of my blog - written by a boy who dreams big, speaks less, listen a lot, writes to inspire, sometimes erratic, most of the time unpredictable, perpetually confused yet has the tendency to over-analyze things and offer abysmal two-cents, he who ravenously reads in earnestness, displays unfeigned arrogance even at a dimunitive pet peeve, gravitates towards the understanding of humankind, relishes in psychological order of Man, dedicates his life to an arduous journey of lifelong learning and he, i repeat, he who would trade his life for the benefits of his paramour. In layman terms - an emotional and sensitive person i am, therefore i could and would do anything for the one i love, in the name of love.

Back to business, yesterday i managed to tune in to OKTO channel's Human Spirit. The feature was on 'The Mermaid Girl', about the story of an eight-year-old girl, who was born without legs, but a fused limb resembling a mermaid's tail. The poor child have been consistently checking in and out of the hospital for operations, dialysis, therapy, check-ups and follow-ups, and i have such empathy towards her. No child at that age should suffer like she does. My heart ached watching the show. I teared during segments where she pleaded and cried for her mom while undergoing dialysis, and have to contend with numerous needles inserted on her. But she was a good sport. Despite being overwhelmed with several life-threatening ailments, her remarkable attitude and will to live paved the way for a more formidable human spirit.

We all go through some hardships in life, it is how you turn that experience into an education. Surely without falling, you'll never know how to stand. As with through the mistakes of others, will we learn. You'll never achieve success without failing at some point of time. And if you don't trust a try, how would you know what's coming for you? Your future is the dreams you make.

I shall leave you with a quote - ''Sometimes, God purposely hides the sun. And he brings thunder and lightning. We ask ourselves where could the sun have gone to...Alas, He actually wants to present us with rainbows after the storm.''

PS: In all honesty, visions of your laughter and smile soothes my longing. There is not a day the idea of you did not pay me a visit. I hate to admit it but i am very much still in love with you. But happiness is about setting your lover free to pursue what/who can make them happy. I hope you have found the answers on what love truly means through our memorable relationship. God Bless.''