Back again. So year 2009 is imminent. I have not spare myself even a dimunitive bit of time to draw up my resolutions. I can't help but wonder if any would materialized. I have simple wishes for the New Year. It's not far-fetched. Neither are they overtly ambitious of sorts. Here are my TOP 20:
1. Complete my TWO Diplomas + Degree 2. Find a new government job. 3. Travel to exotic countries 4. Work on a swimmer's body 5. Take part in a reality TV show 6. Participate in triathlons 7. Pick up Japanese/Spanish/French 8. Attempt anything and everything at least ONCE 9. Undergo Lasik 10. Learn ONE big word everyday 11. Fulfill needy children's wishes 12. Meet influential people/icons 13. Read more books 14. Ask parents to retire 15. Maintain a healthy lifestyle 16. Get into a serious relationship 17. Buy my own pad 18. Cut my own album 19. Be an inspiration to others 20. Be Somebody
Life ain't gonna be this hard eh?
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Monday, December 29, 2008
Love Works
Hello. I hope you had an awesome sunday. Mine was frenetic to ends. But the salvo would be the wedding solemnization of one of my good friend that i attended. I am really glad that she has set a matrimonial home with her significant other. Her radiance sparkled under the sunday's brilliant sun and she really is transitioning into a full woman. Looking at her sitting pretty at the bridal dais brimming with joy and emanating subtle regret of leaving singlehood behind, the onus is suddenly darted at me by friends and acquaintances. When will you be next?
I have a twisted love life. I've fallen in and out of love but the everlast factor does not bode well with me. I just don't have the fortune. Or is it because i don't understand the mechanics of love? Love is too intricate and complex for the mind to absorb, the heart to understand. I don't go out and seek for love because love is something that comes naturally. You'll know it if it's love when the heart sends a nagging vibe and tug your feelings whenever that person is with you. Which explains why i can't quite hold down steady relationships thus far, because what i've experienced is predominantly lust, not love. Plus the physical outlook, rather than what mattered inside the depths of the heart. I've not had such reverberation until recently. I think i've fallen for someone. I can't disclose much of this person because i think it wouldn't generate positive impression from the others, much less a nod. Frankly speaking, it seemed almost sacrilegious but i wouldn't want the opinions of others to withhold my chance at happiness. I would trust a try and delve into a relationship with that person if i can find out if similar sentiments are shared. For now, i am forcibly transcendent in my behaviour towards that person because i really want to protect the interest, and heart; and i would cater every attention, in order to make me a good man in that person's eyes.
I really can't tell you what i am feeling exactly because love is something everyone does not quite understand. But what is affirmed is that 'love' is developing vigourously in me and i can't wait to savor every opportunity i get when i am next to that person. That person might just find out in its natural course and by the little things i did, out of care, concern, trust and 'love'. I hope you see it through my eyes. Because from my eyes will lead you to my heart, where there the answer lies. For now, i am committing my focus to the other only thing that matters; looking good. Hence the picture. Have a fab week ahead.
Ps: I found you in my second semester. January is my third. That is all i would reveal. Go figure. =)
Saturday, December 27, 2008
An Indelible Memory
If one can obliterate memories and never recall again, what would he wish to negate? Mistakes that he wish he'd never done? I am crestfallen. The presentation that i had a while ago in class received lukewarm response from the lecturer, albeit the good comments pertinent to illuminating the presentation with lively speakers. I can't recalled the other good stuff he remarked because the negative ones are heavily saturating my mind.
I truly believed in my assignment and there is nothing i would change about it, if i had done it differently. Perhaps give more reasoning on why American Media is dominant and integral in our Asian society? That could be it that could ascent the score to be slightly higher than the given. Or could it be because we could do with more speakers to validate the presentation? I cannot comprehend in a coherent manner. What ifs, buts and i could've are spinning in my head.
Admittedly i am subdued and not as vocal as i would have been. I don't know what's holding me back. I could have been the most fluid speaker but i can't shake the inhibitions and run the show like a ringleader. The saving grace would be that the others teams are self-destructing with irrelevant topics, lengthy statistics, facts and figures in slides, half-hearted attitude, malfunctioned files and uninspiring presentations. If Eric hadn't brought his cheery and sunshiny presentation style forth, it would have been much dire because i am an earnest speaker who rather arrest attention with a good speech than being an anecdotist.
Oh heck, we still attained above just passed mark. This coming from the harshest of critics. I really am understanding the phrase, 'the higher you climb, the harder the fall'. Blame it on an overload of confidence. But for me, every experience is education. So i can't discount that. I hope my team does not lose faith in me because the leader would be answerable for his team's performance. Share a piece of my humble pie, anyone? It's my birthday. haa...
I truly believed in my assignment and there is nothing i would change about it, if i had done it differently. Perhaps give more reasoning on why American Media is dominant and integral in our Asian society? That could be it that could ascent the score to be slightly higher than the given. Or could it be because we could do with more speakers to validate the presentation? I cannot comprehend in a coherent manner. What ifs, buts and i could've are spinning in my head.
Admittedly i am subdued and not as vocal as i would have been. I don't know what's holding me back. I could have been the most fluid speaker but i can't shake the inhibitions and run the show like a ringleader. The saving grace would be that the others teams are self-destructing with irrelevant topics, lengthy statistics, facts and figures in slides, half-hearted attitude, malfunctioned files and uninspiring presentations. If Eric hadn't brought his cheery and sunshiny presentation style forth, it would have been much dire because i am an earnest speaker who rather arrest attention with a good speech than being an anecdotist.
Oh heck, we still attained above just passed mark. This coming from the harshest of critics. I really am understanding the phrase, 'the higher you climb, the harder the fall'. Blame it on an overload of confidence. But for me, every experience is education. So i can't discount that. I hope my team does not lose faith in me because the leader would be answerable for his team's performance. Share a piece of my humble pie, anyone? It's my birthday. haa...
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Rain On My Parade
The dinner that Nawi and i had at Fish & Co. Express at Downtown East was simply out of this world. It did not burn holes in our pockets and the serving portions were generous. This eatery certainly tops the list and i will make a comeback very soon. We took some photos but i will upload it once i get around connecting my new phone to my pc. I'm an idiot when it comes to cabling. I guess i was a blonde in my previous life...
It was an immensed guilt for me for the streak of unfortunate events that befell Nawi. Firstly he dropped his limited edition LG mobile phone onto the cold hard ground in the downpour, and grazed it as a result. Then a parking summon was issued for the absence of parking coupon. Damn. If only we did not plan to have dinner just now. I gotta figure something out soon to appease him and get his mind off these niggling issues. But he's generally not fastidious by nature. Perhaps i could buy him dinner on saturday? I don't know...
On a cheery note, i got myself a smokin' hot blue swimming trunks. That would add up to the many trunks i already have in my drawer. I will look great in it, man. Regardless of the notion that men will look tacky in Speedos. Once i tone down my figure a bit and trim the baby fats off (idling at home is not doing good for my body!), i will parade the beach like an attention-seeking whore. Yeah, maybe i would post pictures of THAT here. How many Malay boys you know wear swimming trunks anyway? =)
It was an immensed guilt for me for the streak of unfortunate events that befell Nawi. Firstly he dropped his limited edition LG mobile phone onto the cold hard ground in the downpour, and grazed it as a result. Then a parking summon was issued for the absence of parking coupon. Damn. If only we did not plan to have dinner just now. I gotta figure something out soon to appease him and get his mind off these niggling issues. But he's generally not fastidious by nature. Perhaps i could buy him dinner on saturday? I don't know...
On a cheery note, i got myself a smokin' hot blue swimming trunks. That would add up to the many trunks i already have in my drawer. I will look great in it, man. Regardless of the notion that men will look tacky in Speedos. Once i tone down my figure a bit and trim the baby fats off (idling at home is not doing good for my body!), i will parade the beach like an attention-seeking whore. Yeah, maybe i would post pictures of THAT here. How many Malay boys you know wear swimming trunks anyway? =)
A Thank You Note
The more the days are advancing towards the new year, the more unsettling it gets. Looking back, i couldn't help thinking of the things i would have done differently, could have done, left behind...Then we have the looking forward into the future. I hope to stack my 2009 calendar with more consequential tasks...and utilized the days with gratifiable effects. Plus, i really need to materialize all shelved resolutions and make good of vows and promises of yesteryears. But above all, i would just want another year of good health for myself, family and the friends around me...without wellness of health, there is no use of all wealth in the world.
Anyways, i need to do a quick shoutout to my TVRP's project crew - shane, ghandi, jennifer, aqram, radzi and melvin. Because of the fusion of creativities and variant inputs, we have scored an A! Amazing! Now i am gunning for a similar alphabet for my saturday's presentation. Don't falter now, people!
Glenn, Eric, Shayne, Shane, Chelsea, Erica, Benson, Brennan, Daniel Woo, Mike GQ, Rae, James and the many others i couldn't mention (too many of you guys!), have yourselves a merry christmas. Happy Holidays all.
Anyways, i need to do a quick shoutout to my TVRP's project crew - shane, ghandi, jennifer, aqram, radzi and melvin. Because of the fusion of creativities and variant inputs, we have scored an A! Amazing! Now i am gunning for a similar alphabet for my saturday's presentation. Don't falter now, people!
Glenn, Eric, Shayne, Shane, Chelsea, Erica, Benson, Brennan, Daniel Woo, Mike GQ, Rae, James and the many others i couldn't mention (too many of you guys!), have yourselves a merry christmas. Happy Holidays all.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Sunday Seems To Be The Hardest Word
Eric and i were at Vivocity. I still can't figure why i had to say yes to go shopping with him there when weekend shopping is my bugbear. I mean, Vivocity on a sunday, being the last weekend to grab 11th hour pressies before yuletide rings? Did i mentioned that the Home Team recruitment fair was conducted there? You can almost imagine the riotous jostlings. But it was a decent retreat and it sure beats idling at home and get wasted away. I have my eyes fixated on a Zara bomber jacket. It's a tad pricey but i think i can pull it off. It's something i would wear for traveling, auditions, night outs with pals...It's chic ya'll. Likewise for a Topman jacket that i took a fancy on. If Eric hadn't halt my sub-concious intent, i would prolly gravitate towards impulsive shopping. Oh yeah, thanks for the Fish & Co. man. Now i feel for a tit-for-tat and see the need to buy him dinner back.
On a devastating note, i am abhorrent of these newly designed public transport. Namely the MRT trains and SBS buses. What purpose does it serve to take away the seats? So that the space becomes roomier and can cater to physically handicapped people? I don't buy the bullshit. Like how often anyway do the disabled get on these public transports? Do you remember the last time you caught sight of a wheelchair-bound pax? I think we are having a warped concept. What, so seats will soon be removed from food courts and restaurants so wheelchaired diners can manoeuvre in? The able bodied ones will stand while tucking in a delectable plate of hor fun? Can you buy the explanation that the seats in the trains are removed so more pax can enter the cabin? So now we have to stand even when we are paying for the increasing fares? And that the fare hikes are increased so commuters will get that extra comfort which is justified? What is happening Transport Minister?
We give up our seats for the elderly and families with kids in tow, and the pregnant women too. We resigned when bloody uni students selfishly study in fast food centres and cafes thus depriving actual diners of having their meals. Then sometimes when we finally settle for a quick makan at coffee shops, some bastards would let their pet dogs occupy the seats. It's abysmal and unconstitutional. These people should be jailed for at least a year, pay ludicrous amount of fines, do CWO, go for rehab, serve probations and wear eletronic tag on their ankles. Whatever. I hope when i'm president, these ugly people would migrate to Pulau Tekong, Pedra Branca...'Cos i will slap these bitches with my Beetlebug loafers. Real hard.
On a devastating note, i am abhorrent of these newly designed public transport. Namely the MRT trains and SBS buses. What purpose does it serve to take away the seats? So that the space becomes roomier and can cater to physically handicapped people? I don't buy the bullshit. Like how often anyway do the disabled get on these public transports? Do you remember the last time you caught sight of a wheelchair-bound pax? I think we are having a warped concept. What, so seats will soon be removed from food courts and restaurants so wheelchaired diners can manoeuvre in? The able bodied ones will stand while tucking in a delectable plate of hor fun? Can you buy the explanation that the seats in the trains are removed so more pax can enter the cabin? So now we have to stand even when we are paying for the increasing fares? And that the fare hikes are increased so commuters will get that extra comfort which is justified? What is happening Transport Minister?
We give up our seats for the elderly and families with kids in tow, and the pregnant women too. We resigned when bloody uni students selfishly study in fast food centres and cafes thus depriving actual diners of having their meals. Then sometimes when we finally settle for a quick makan at coffee shops, some bastards would let their pet dogs occupy the seats. It's abysmal and unconstitutional. These people should be jailed for at least a year, pay ludicrous amount of fines, do CWO, go for rehab, serve probations and wear eletronic tag on their ankles. Whatever. I hope when i'm president, these ugly people would migrate to Pulau Tekong, Pedra Branca...'Cos i will slap these bitches with my Beetlebug loafers. Real hard.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
A Public Apology
I broke someone's heart today. This is the first time i ever felt sorry for my actions and did not realised that my diatribes made me look like an ass in the eyes of a good friend. We were having a neat conversation when it spiralled into caustic remarks and i had to rambled and emanate negative vibes in retort. It wasn't purely defence mechanism but i felt compeled to reason with sense. It is much more of the distrust part that overwhelmed me and i have a problem when someone reduce a significant part of trust in friendships. I mean, i wouldn't care enough if i do not have an affinity with the person. But if those friends that i care and look out for are hurt, i would be hurt just as much.
I am dedicating this post to Eric. SORRY for the silly uncalled questions and stuff. Just to let him know that i am still dependable, reliable and trustworthy of a sidekick and i'm pretty sure the bone of contention of this misunderstanding is merely lackadaisical talk. I know you like me to be your good pal still. Let's not burn bridges albeit the poles apart thoughts. If you're good, i'm good.
I am dedicating this post to Eric. SORRY for the silly uncalled questions and stuff. Just to let him know that i am still dependable, reliable and trustworthy of a sidekick and i'm pretty sure the bone of contention of this misunderstanding is merely lackadaisical talk. I know you like me to be your good pal still. Let's not burn bridges albeit the poles apart thoughts. If you're good, i'm good.
Friday, December 19, 2008
Faith Glistening
After a litany of researches, the lecturer has conformed to our vision by saying our project is in lieu of his expectations. It is coming full circle. I rejoiced. It means our efforts has harvested and produced rewarding results. I need to thank my FOUR other group members for riding the waves with me. The final icing needs to be glossed over and i hope the presentation next week will raise the bar and samurai sword-slay the other groups. Because i have absolute faith that we've got this in the bag and it will make a good show. I know.
It's a first for me. Muhammad gave me a ride back and forth in a pick up lorry, that he took custody of from his friend, who is out of the country. It wasn't glamorous, or so he pointed out, but neither was it an issue for me. I'm not high maintenance, buddy!
The core focus now is to bury my head in my textbooks because exams are heading near. I need to trim my social life and fathom the underlyings of words off the study book. I do want to attain at least Bs for these THREE modules. If i can help it. I need to round up some classmates and do group studying soon. God, my life revolves around my studies the instant i left my job...I had left behind day/night outs with good friends, the witching hour suppers, the insane shopping, the reduction of tv watching, meeting people, the freedom to lead a carefree life and not inundated with projects and assignments...The time and money invested will be worth it, when i am rewarded with the elusive academic scrolls. I will run to you you bastard.
It's a first for me. Muhammad gave me a ride back and forth in a pick up lorry, that he took custody of from his friend, who is out of the country. It wasn't glamorous, or so he pointed out, but neither was it an issue for me. I'm not high maintenance, buddy!
The core focus now is to bury my head in my textbooks because exams are heading near. I need to trim my social life and fathom the underlyings of words off the study book. I do want to attain at least Bs for these THREE modules. If i can help it. I need to round up some classmates and do group studying soon. God, my life revolves around my studies the instant i left my job...I had left behind day/night outs with good friends, the witching hour suppers, the insane shopping, the reduction of tv watching, meeting people, the freedom to lead a carefree life and not inundated with projects and assignments...The time and money invested will be worth it, when i am rewarded with the elusive academic scrolls. I will run to you you bastard.
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Case Of The Mistaken Identity
Just got home from a meeting of sorts with two classmates. I am dumbfounded. Jerrica, a pretty project mate, took a cordial swipe at me by popping me the done to death, pen-ultimate question - 'Are you Filipino?'...I had to fend off such inquisitve minds far too often. No, it doesn't get my goat. It's prolly something i have to live with and routinely battle against, with resignation.
Countless people on the streets - from the post office auntie to the bank teller to classmates from every new semester assumed i am Filipino or some other foreign nationals. I suspect it could be my unconventional english accent that you can't put a finger to of its origin. It further validates their assumption when i say my name is Eddie. Like a malay with an english name? Well both my late grandparents were British Nationals and hailed from Christmas Island. For the uninitiated, it is an island in Australia. You figure. I am not making a mountain out of a molehill and don't get me wrong, i think the Pinoys are courteous and one of the most polite people on earth. However, has it ever occured to you that i am of a new breed of young Singaporeans who IS not part of the cookie cutter generation?
It's pretty nifty for having the skills to flawlessly converse in good english. I guess one will be highly regarded by society. I get my cheap thrills from masquerading as a foreigner each time i pop into town to do my shopping. I tell you the salespeople would be floored and try to bootlick if they can. Because they know foreigners are dimwits and can easily part with BIG money so they can have BIG commissions. All this when i don't freaking look like foreigner. I just want their staff discounts okay? Regardless of the branding game, i am damn proud to be a Singaporean. And the new malay. Thank you for being able to see that i am uniquely manufactured. Yes, Jerrica & Eric, i did tell you guys i would migrate if i could when you posed the question. But only to work, not to live in a whole new country. There is no place like home. =)
Countless people on the streets - from the post office auntie to the bank teller to classmates from every new semester assumed i am Filipino or some other foreign nationals. I suspect it could be my unconventional english accent that you can't put a finger to of its origin. It further validates their assumption when i say my name is Eddie. Like a malay with an english name? Well both my late grandparents were British Nationals and hailed from Christmas Island. For the uninitiated, it is an island in Australia. You figure. I am not making a mountain out of a molehill and don't get me wrong, i think the Pinoys are courteous and one of the most polite people on earth. However, has it ever occured to you that i am of a new breed of young Singaporeans who IS not part of the cookie cutter generation?
It's pretty nifty for having the skills to flawlessly converse in good english. I guess one will be highly regarded by society. I get my cheap thrills from masquerading as a foreigner each time i pop into town to do my shopping. I tell you the salespeople would be floored and try to bootlick if they can. Because they know foreigners are dimwits and can easily part with BIG money so they can have BIG commissions. All this when i don't freaking look like foreigner. I just want their staff discounts okay? Regardless of the branding game, i am damn proud to be a Singaporean. And the new malay. Thank you for being able to see that i am uniquely manufactured. Yes, Jerrica & Eric, i did tell you guys i would migrate if i could when you posed the question. But only to work, not to live in a whole new country. There is no place like home. =)
An Opulent Landscape
A panoramic sight to behold, looking out from my bedroom at 07:55am. You can see parts of Punggol, Hougang, Pasir Ris Camp, Pasir Ris Beach, Coney Island and there is even a sight of Pasir Gudang's industrial factories. I wish the view comes with Pulau Tekong. Ha...But i hope they will demolish the UFO-ish commercial building right smack in the middle. Maybe then i may even see National Day fireworks from my room...
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Batteries Not Included.
I am not attending TVRP class today. Lethargy has overwhelmed me and inspired me to hibernate at home. My mind would prolly deviate far from my physical vessel and take a stroll along Orchard Road or somewhere in a boutique in Vivocity. Then the lecturer will whack my head with his uninspiring textbook for not paying attention to his sermon.
I need to administer full concentration and get in sound shape everytime i get to class. Today is remotely impossible. My limbs and c**k just froze with weariness and i really really really wanna stay in and revitalise. And do some manly cry for The Little Nyonya show. Heez. I gotta go harass Shane and ask what transpired today. See you in a while.
PS: The Little Nyonya is worth paying your due attention to. It has fine casts, superb acting skills, good script and morsels of cultural knowledge you may inadvertently pick up while watching it. =)
I need to administer full concentration and get in sound shape everytime i get to class. Today is remotely impossible. My limbs and c**k just froze with weariness and i really really really wanna stay in and revitalise. And do some manly cry for The Little Nyonya show. Heez. I gotta go harass Shane and ask what transpired today. See you in a while.
PS: The Little Nyonya is worth paying your due attention to. It has fine casts, superb acting skills, good script and morsels of cultural knowledge you may inadvertently pick up while watching it. =)
Monday, December 15, 2008
Makin' Merry
I am elated. It's almost orgasmic that i have spent serious moolah and got myself a swanky new phone, gold rings and some dope shoes. But i was indecisive on what to get for a friend's forthcoming birthday. All i know of him is he's into mod or androgynous fashion and i have no inkling of a suitable gift. Regardless of what i bought, the joy is still seeing in someone's face when he/she receives a present. Well for me, the thrill is in the giving concept. I do hope he relishes in it when it is passed on thursday...Think nothing of it. It's the little things one can do for friends.
I am super glad that next week is the last week of the semester. Which means i no longer will standoff with bacterial-irritant classmates, being knife-point on intolerable lectures, devastating MRT trips back and forth to school and migraine-inducing assignments. Don't get me wrong, i love doing projects with people who have akin acute visions like mine. Because pressure and working under duress will compel people to produce good results. It's a mountainous climb but don't you think the view on top will be splendid? You think?
I am super glad that next week is the last week of the semester. Which means i no longer will standoff with bacterial-irritant classmates, being knife-point on intolerable lectures, devastating MRT trips back and forth to school and migraine-inducing assignments. Don't get me wrong, i love doing projects with people who have akin acute visions like mine. Because pressure and working under duress will compel people to produce good results. It's a mountainous climb but don't you think the view on top will be splendid? You think?
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Self-Destruct
Wee. It's raining huskies and felines. It'll be euphoric to just abode under the sheets and sleep through a sunday. But it's not idealistic to whittle the day when time can be utilised with other responsible things like driving your family out for a brunch or spending quality time with a loved one or spring cleaning your cluttered room or whatever rocks your boat.
I figure i may disintegrate myself in front of my pc's screen while watching excessive flicks on youtube. That is, if a good friend of almost seven years can affirm his plan of lunching out and movie-ing. Then he may save me from self-destruction. You see, he is fickle-minded and has this inconstant and wretched mind. Plans can be abolished at the very last minute and it's those erratic moment when you have dressed up, and the plan goes poof. So what am i going to do in my sunday best since i am groomed up?Go for Frances Yip concert at the Indoor Stadium?Or shamelessly come uninvited and devour the calorific nasi bryani at some malay wedding in Bedok?
Whatever the to do list, i am not revisiting my assignments today. I rather go out and get blown by some bitches if today's plan gets squashed. Maybe.
I figure i may disintegrate myself in front of my pc's screen while watching excessive flicks on youtube. That is, if a good friend of almost seven years can affirm his plan of lunching out and movie-ing. Then he may save me from self-destruction. You see, he is fickle-minded and has this inconstant and wretched mind. Plans can be abolished at the very last minute and it's those erratic moment when you have dressed up, and the plan goes poof. So what am i going to do in my sunday best since i am groomed up?Go for Frances Yip concert at the Indoor Stadium?Or shamelessly come uninvited and devour the calorific nasi bryani at some malay wedding in Bedok?
Whatever the to do list, i am not revisiting my assignments today. I rather go out and get blown by some bitches if today's plan gets squashed. Maybe.
Friday, December 12, 2008
Superbad
Check my playlist out - Superbad. I have had detractors stepping up, or away for that matter, telling me how i should stop demeaning people and quit being a bitch about everything. This persona is not inborn whatsoever, but a guard that i put up, or a fortress if you like to call it, to protect me from the wild elements and negative energy from people. And this is to impede their cruel intentions of taking me for a ride. I don't like to be trifled with. Because I AM a bad boy. It sure sounds brash. But if you can read people well, you know i am just like you. But damn stronger. You will find out that this veneer of mine attributes to my intuitive nature, visceral abilities and good people perception.
People say i am aloof. It couldn't be far from the truth. I won't stick around with people whom i have lack of affinity with, hence they may think we will readily be friends. I will emit a clear but subtle signal to steer clear from me. If that does not work, callousness and curt responsiveness almost always works. I don't need to be friends with just anybody. Or even keep contacts of ugly people in my contact book. You rarely call them anyway. It's a waste of space too. I can easily get irritated with people who crosses my boundaries and reject my reality and opinions. If i am chummy and extra nice to someone, that's when i know i have that friend to fall back on and one who is worthy of my time and attention. Step up to me and trust a try. You may leave a lasting impression or a purported lipstick stain on me...Ready for an opportunity?
People say i am aloof. It couldn't be far from the truth. I won't stick around with people whom i have lack of affinity with, hence they may think we will readily be friends. I will emit a clear but subtle signal to steer clear from me. If that does not work, callousness and curt responsiveness almost always works. I don't need to be friends with just anybody. Or even keep contacts of ugly people in my contact book. You rarely call them anyway. It's a waste of space too. I can easily get irritated with people who crosses my boundaries and reject my reality and opinions. If i am chummy and extra nice to someone, that's when i know i have that friend to fall back on and one who is worthy of my time and attention. Step up to me and trust a try. You may leave a lasting impression or a purported lipstick stain on me...Ready for an opportunity?
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Rude Awakening
Wow. Friday yet?So what have you got for me in the bag Mr. Friday?Grim pressies?Hope not. Because i know you can pull out more than rabbits from your hat...
The session in class tickled me today. It was a remix of silly bitches attempting hollow talk again, the reprisal of horrific assignments, sulking babies and whatnot.
My dear Eric, a pixie sized project mate of mine, invalidated my reasons of not having enough time to complete my portion of the project. I was flushed. It felt all the good effort, done in good faith, being elbowed out. It's pretty hard to digest because us being the TWO dominant forces in the group who's doing most of the tasks up till now, are entangled in unneccesary intensified behaviour. I can totally understand him. We are not able to buy time any longer and datelines are looming. In fact, i've been at it since day ONE. Trust me on this one man. It's either we do a very good job or we don't do one at all...By the way, teamspiritedness does not leave behind anyone. Welcome back, you two.
The session in class tickled me today. It was a remix of silly bitches attempting hollow talk again, the reprisal of horrific assignments, sulking babies and whatnot.
My dear Eric, a pixie sized project mate of mine, invalidated my reasons of not having enough time to complete my portion of the project. I was flushed. It felt all the good effort, done in good faith, being elbowed out. It's pretty hard to digest because us being the TWO dominant forces in the group who's doing most of the tasks up till now, are entangled in unneccesary intensified behaviour. I can totally understand him. We are not able to buy time any longer and datelines are looming. In fact, i've been at it since day ONE. Trust me on this one man. It's either we do a very good job or we don't do one at all...By the way, teamspiritedness does not leave behind anyone. Welcome back, you two.
An Understated Realist
The Former SPF OfficerIt's fabulous. I'm psyched that the weekend is gonna pay us all a visit soon. Not a fan of saturdays and sundays though. I'd function better on days of 1-5. But it's an exception for now. Because i can break away from the monotony of heading to class three times a week. Yeak!
Anyway, I just cannot comprehend how some naysayers can blatantly remark that one will be a redundant asset if he doesn't bring home the dough and support his family. Friends disparagingly say i am an imbecile for leaving a government's job. Grandma's consistent roaring dwells in my ears, asking me to hurry and get a new career. Then there were the people who have the notion of Eddie should have all the time in the world at his feet. It gets stifling and claustrophobic dude. Everthing trickled into a single grouse - Bills.
When your heart is detached from something, and you no longer feel for it, there won't be any contributions of commitment to do. Don't get me wrong. I had learnt so much more than i could ask for and discovered my strengths and weaknesses along the way. After all, i felt FOUR years in SPF is perfect enough for me to gather experience and grow wiser as an individual. That chapter has abated. How would you start on a fresh new page when you're not willing to close the old chapter? The metamorphosis is shaping up so i can be ready to be elevated to the next step in life.
Anyway, I just cannot comprehend how some naysayers can blatantly remark that one will be a redundant asset if he doesn't bring home the dough and support his family. Friends disparagingly say i am an imbecile for leaving a government's job. Grandma's consistent roaring dwells in my ears, asking me to hurry and get a new career. Then there were the people who have the notion of Eddie should have all the time in the world at his feet. It gets stifling and claustrophobic dude. Everthing trickled into a single grouse - Bills.
When your heart is detached from something, and you no longer feel for it, there won't be any contributions of commitment to do. Don't get me wrong. I had learnt so much more than i could ask for and discovered my strengths and weaknesses along the way. After all, i felt FOUR years in SPF is perfect enough for me to gather experience and grow wiser as an individual. That chapter has abated. How would you start on a fresh new page when you're not willing to close the old chapter? The metamorphosis is shaping up so i can be ready to be elevated to the next step in life.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
From Nothin' To Somethin'
Can you believe this?I had gone for a haircut at my usual hairdressers' and i was appalled when a chinese lady from china had taken over the hairdressing duties from the local auntie who has been pimping my hair. I had to play charade with her to get my hair fix and she spoke in mandarin throughout the infuriating haircut. WTF. She could not understand my instructions and get this, I had to converse in basic mandarin instead. What is the government thinking?
Allowing foreign workers here is absolutely consented but when you put them frontline in service sector in particular, and when they are hopless in basic english, it's beyond ludacris. Just last month, i had hopped to Giant supermarket to grab stuffs and when i enquired about a certain product, the audacity of the young china salesgirls to proclaim in my face, 'you speak mandarin?'. It's so unbecoming. Blurb.
Allowing foreign workers here is absolutely consented but when you put them frontline in service sector in particular, and when they are hopless in basic english, it's beyond ludacris. Just last month, i had hopped to Giant supermarket to grab stuffs and when i enquired about a certain product, the audacity of the young china salesgirls to proclaim in my face, 'you speak mandarin?'. It's so unbecoming. Blurb.
2000 HRS
I had just experienced an epiphany of sorts. Now i feel i am adept in solving those minute jigsaw puzzle pieces and beginning to see the whole picture. One moment devastation takes a cruel jab at you then somehow, miracles manifest itself. It's peculiar how situations can change like a flick to a remote...think.
I am still contemplating if i should whip big dollars to get a blazin' new and extravagant mobile phone. It will burn a huge hole in my pocket and i am in the midst of having a little debate session in my thoughts.I am incapable of discerning between needs and wants. It sounds profusely impulsive but the desire is overwhelming man. Because my handphone IS my life-support...so what now?
After The Storm
Wtf. A couple of weeks to go before the mental incaceration is lifted. This gruelling semester is heading for an imminent death. Isn't December a month of joy and to relish the holiday spirit? It's possibly the most distressing month of the whole year and i have never been this exhausted of my spiritual, psychological and physical being. Ever.
Today's lecture were technical and dry. I was teetering to a state of delirium and my mind wandered with total abandon. It was a cocktail of agendas to fulfill, datelines to meet, plans to follow, things to do and what have you. But spirits ascend mildly when a classmate with a fake american accent tried to be a moronic bitch and incessantly expressed his views and thoughts with nary a logic and sense. If you have nothing good to say, shut the f**k up bitch. I would fling my adidas shoes in your nasty face if i hadn't worn slippers to school. Woah, slippers to school?Didn't MDIS banned slippers already? How did i slip in sans getting caught? Awesome.
Despite funky days ahead, i shall draw every effort and strength to see me through the week. I'm converting every hardship into life lessons and such experiences will only be new chapters added in the pages of book of life don't you think?Have a cuppa and i will see you in a bit.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
The Second Coming
I am screwed. No, not in the subservient context of my ass getting pounded and humped. But the possibility of being a train-wreck, grappling with a tumultuous week ahead. It's just day TWO of the week yet agendas and assignments are abound relentlessly.
I have toiled and put in extra effort towards my modules' projects since the beginning of the semester. It's God sent that i am in a band of project mates that shared my vision to seek for an A. The blood, tears and sweat better reap gratifying rewards. Otherwise for a D result, i will murder myself by stabbing my eyes with mom's anna sui eye pencil and pushing a dildo down my throat while putting Rihanna's songs on loop mode. It's an original hara kiri that Mortal Kombat game would like to copy from. Whatever.
On a lighter note, i have signed up for a certain singing competition. The audition will commence tomorrow and i feel not a bit of anxiety nor arrested with panic attacks. Because shamelessly i profess that i can sing man. We'll find out together as i detail the whole process. Can't hardly wait. Oh I'm singing Oleta Adams 'Get Here'. Darn high notes to register okay. ('',)
I have toiled and put in extra effort towards my modules' projects since the beginning of the semester. It's God sent that i am in a band of project mates that shared my vision to seek for an A. The blood, tears and sweat better reap gratifying rewards. Otherwise for a D result, i will murder myself by stabbing my eyes with mom's anna sui eye pencil and pushing a dildo down my throat while putting Rihanna's songs on loop mode. It's an original hara kiri that Mortal Kombat game would like to copy from. Whatever.
On a lighter note, i have signed up for a certain singing competition. The audition will commence tomorrow and i feel not a bit of anxiety nor arrested with panic attacks. Because shamelessly i profess that i can sing man. We'll find out together as i detail the whole process. Can't hardly wait. Oh I'm singing Oleta Adams 'Get Here'. Darn high notes to register okay. ('',)
World Premiere
Hello. I'm pretty certain there'll be no use of any introduction. I am pro-social and i have accounts with the bigwigs of social networking sites, namely Facebook, Friendster, Myspace...
Call me a tech whore. I'd buy that. But call me a bitch and i will man-slap you. Ha...the word is second nature to me. Not as in like a 2am male hooker you know. But best known for my grit, bravado and unwavering spirit. And unafraid to be vocal about issues.
Honest to goodness, i am clueless on where i am in life. I do know what i want but one's destiny is purely an enigma. Yeah, i have a dogmatic approach of living but when things are not working out on your end, you become frenetic and start to question your actions and moves. Hey, be it bitter or sweet, or all sugar and spice, you pick yourself up, dust it off and walk again. Without failures, one wouldn't know his weakness ain't it? Life is not all beauty and fancy dammit.
By the way, for the record, i have resigned from the police force. It's back to student life. Devoted my time and attention to studies. I want that bloody degree in my hands before i hit 30.
For now, i am enduring and experiencing a mix of dry, uninspiring, and tormenting rounds of lectures. But i will soldier on. Them copious amount of researches, projects and assignments will not kill me.
Call me a tech whore. I'd buy that. But call me a bitch and i will man-slap you. Ha...the word is second nature to me. Not as in like a 2am male hooker you know. But best known for my grit, bravado and unwavering spirit. And unafraid to be vocal about issues.
Honest to goodness, i am clueless on where i am in life. I do know what i want but one's destiny is purely an enigma. Yeah, i have a dogmatic approach of living but when things are not working out on your end, you become frenetic and start to question your actions and moves. Hey, be it bitter or sweet, or all sugar and spice, you pick yourself up, dust it off and walk again. Without failures, one wouldn't know his weakness ain't it? Life is not all beauty and fancy dammit.
By the way, for the record, i have resigned from the police force. It's back to student life. Devoted my time and attention to studies. I want that bloody degree in my hands before i hit 30.
For now, i am enduring and experiencing a mix of dry, uninspiring, and tormenting rounds of lectures. But i will soldier on. Them copious amount of researches, projects and assignments will not kill me.
Welcome To The Wonderful World Of Me
Based on a true story. It follows the footsteps of an individual and documents his wholesome journey. This is the pen-ultimate self-journal. For this is the insights that delves into the intricate mind of a boy they call Eddie.
It'll be a voyeuristic pleasure. Read all about it. Perhaps you can decipher who and what i truly am. This is the 'greatest hits' album of my life.
It'll be a voyeuristic pleasure. Read all about it. Perhaps you can decipher who and what i truly am. This is the 'greatest hits' album of my life.
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