Bag Raid

Bag check. I'm sure you would be keen to find out what i always lug around in my bag. I've never done this, but for the first time ever, i will divulge the dirty little secrets of mine and lay it all out for you to see. These TEN items are the essential things that i chuck in my bag. (missing in the picture is a brolly, a perfume bottle, mints and a coin bag)

(Clockwise from the top)

01. Gucci Sunglasses - I bought this for $400 in 2003. I use this mostly during driving to protect my eyes from the glare of the sun, DKNY Spectacles - I am shortsighted. On days when i feel lazy or having a red eye/eye infection, i won't pop my contact lens in and wear this instead, No Brand Retro Glasses - I wear this during days when i feel crazy and trying to look preppy. I can't remember how much it cost but i think it's below 10 bucks.

02. Turquoise Hue Portable Sony Playstation Slim (PSP) - I am not a fan of games. I am on it only when i want to watch music videos that i have downloaded from youtube and stuff. The only game that i got around completing and one that can keep me grounded is Mortal Kombat - Unchained. Super dope!

03. A Good Book - I think factual crime stories, by Ann Rule for instance, can be rivetting. I don't dig chick books like Twilight, Harry Potter and the works. I am drawn to self-help, influential ones. I carry a good book around and immersed myself during long trips in the MRT or airplane, when i'm travelling. My mom bought me Dan Brown's The Da Vinci Code and i have not even touched it in the 3 years in my posession. I don't quite understand it! Right now i am reading Steve Martini's 'The Arraignment'.

04. Samsung Slide Speaker 4GB Mp3 Player - I have several hundred songs ranging from Britney Spears, Chris Daughtry, Josh Groban, M.I.A, Aretha Franklin, Hooverphonics, Coldplay, Chingy, Lamya...I bought this because of the touch screen feature and for the fact that i don't have to use the earphone when i want to share the music with my friends. I would just slide and crystal crisp audio will be emitted. The downside is the capacity! I can't fit my almost 4000 songs collection in it! I don't fancy Ipod because the sound is so-so. But i guess i'll get it because it has an insane storage of 160GB or something. No?

05. House/Car Keys - Need i emphasize? I have a great car key. My car works on sensor and you don't need to use the key the open the car door or to ignite the engine. Awesome. The house keys includes my drawer keys! Which is considered as my SAFE! I will go crazy if i lose this bunch!

06. Name Card Holder - I have various name cards in here and i think it is almost bursting. I don't store number of companies, stores or business contacts in my phone. So this one does the job of handling my 'corporate' matters.

07. Yogi Bear Pouch - I think this multi-purpose pouch looks great. I got it for $4 at Beach Road. It's a steal! It is cartoonish and most of all it stores small things like aspirins, an atomiser, vicks inhaler, lip balms, and blotters. I throw my rings in here too. As you can see, i have condoms here as well. All i can say is i am down to my last one. *snickers*

08. Esprit Wallet - I need to go get a new wallet. It looks bulky and so un-manly. I have my identification card, driver's licence, ez-link, student card, various ATM/Debit cards, Safra membership card, thick wads of notes etc. I would prolly cry for 3 days 3 nights should i lose my wallet because i can't keep tab and would figure where to start to replace the contents as i have so many cards in it. Of course i don't keep discount and loyalty cards. Haha!

09. White LG Viewty 5-Mp Mobile Phone - I got this phone late last year. I don't quite fancy this because the functions are not so user friendly. Unlike Nokia, which i have been a loyal consumer for as long as i can remember. I guess i'll hang on to this for a good one year before i switch back to Nokia. This current phone has a touch screen interface and typing sms can be a bitch! I would be glad if they did not do away with the keypad. But the 5-Megapixel camera feature is amazing. Some stellar shots!

10. (Center) Fossil Notebook, Precious Thots' Notepad & Pierre Cardin Pen - I do a lot of writing. As i sing/songwrite on a freelance basis, i will pen down any inspirations or rhythm of songs that comes to mind. I write some important things on it as well, like expenditures, things to buy, agendas...Oh there are doodlings too. And as a student doing Mass Comm, i will jot down lecture notes and also some complex words that i have just discovered or come across. I will add these new words into knowledge and apply it to my journalism skills. The pen was a gift. I wish it was Mont Blanc diamond-embedded one though.

These things alone are dramatic. I have not shown you the whole range sitting in various closets, drawers and cupboards. What would be the reaction if we do a Raid A Closet in posts to come?

Burning Issues

Life's Burning Questions - Volume 1.

1. Why are today's NSF recruits carrying duffel bags with rollers on it? 2. Why are we seeing an influx of China girls as salespeople? 3. Why are those auxiliary police you see at the airport behave like they are the state police? 4. Why am i seeing a vast number of Suzuki Swift cars on the roads? 5. Why are the touts/people who stopped you on your tracks at the mrt station/bus interchange getting more aggressive and shove useless 30 cents pens for $2 in the name of charity? 6. Why is it everytime you pump petrol at the kiosk, the pump attendant insist on wiping your car, and sometimes, despite the heavy rain outside? 7. Why do Suria Channel keep having re-run programmes? 8. Why does Denise Keller have such an extra huge mouth (like you can keep a Nintendo Wii set in it)? 9. Why isn't Old Changi Hospital torn down yet? 10. Why can't women take out their ez-link cards and tap instead of keeping it in their handbags and swing back & forth trying to scan it, and holding people up in the process? 11. Why do people park like an idiot and taking up the next lot's space? 12. Why do Singaporeans like to complain? 13. Why are there no great local shows now like there used to be in the 90's(Growing Up, Under One Roof, The Ra Ra Show, Asia Bagus...)? 14. Why didn't anyone pointed out that Israel used to be known as Palestine(because Israel stole their land, thus rename it as theirs, today)? 15. Why isn't there a cure for HIV or a truly effective medicine to fight cancer? 16. Why do headphones wires get entangled by itself? 17. Why can't more money notes just be printed to solve economic recession? 18. Why does the Pizza/McDonalds delivery boys have to speed without caution on the roads? 19. Why is it that a prolific Malaysian ex-minister keep bashing Singapore? 20. Why is it that we keep pressing the snooze button when the alarm rings, and promising to wake up in another 5 minutes and oversleep as a result? 21. Why does the MRT track ends at Pasir Ris? 22. Why do we still call ourselves conservative when the sex trade in geylang, changi and deskar is active, and home-made sex videos starring teens make its round freely and furiously? 23. Why are the vehicles getting involved in accidents are always Mitsubishi Evo and Subaru WRX? 24. Why do people still queue up at the post office and 7-eleven to pay bills when AXS and SAM machines are accessible and efficient, and within proximity? 25. Why aren't there any freakin' weapon of mass destruction located, Bush? 26. Why is every single piece of vacant land in Tampines being utilized for residential/commercial purposes? Isn't it too claustrophobic to be surrounded by buildings in every directions? 27. Why do we have to discriminate against drag queens, lesbians and gays when just like you can't expect a straight to be bent, you also can't force them to change to fit society's social norm of thoughts...it's not a choice, it's inborn... 28. Why is everything in Singapore too perfect, structured and ultra cosmopolitan? I mean, even the last of standing villages are wiped out...are we getting too uptight? 29. Why are the actors' genitals in Japanese porn flicks pixellated? 30. Why do people have over 500 to thousands of 'friends' in their social networking site when 90% of the are total strangers and that they are there just to make up the numbers and figures?

Are you with me on any of these? These hot and searing issues are driving me to a corner. That's me. The Grouch. I know you second me on this post. I am not irked, just baffled. Just furnishing you the diabolical aspect of life. My blog is never beauty and fancy. I am sharing life as it is and that it ain't all glossed over and glistening. I am redefining blogging and when you can resonate with issues that i hung out to dry, i know i have done something worthwhile, be it by touching a raw nerve, addressing issues or engaging your mind into participating in sharing sentiments. Let's wrap the month in a good note and bid January a warm goodbye.

A Medley For The Audience

My groin is blistered. No thanks to the bicycle seat that i was on, plying the whole of Pasir Ris Beach/Park a couple of days ago. It's hard to sit on my butt and it's a bitch during the cleaning up after finishing the big business. Being gang-banged must've felt that way. My 'virginity' feels robbed.

I can't believe this. January will leave me behind in a matter of days. I have not witnessed any semblance of resolutions being materialized. Everyday is just a repetition of previous months. Okay perhaps the part where i partake in night runs FOUR times a week now, where it used to be irregular then. And maybe my daily sustenance has tremendously been halved. I eat a lot lesser. Surprisingly i don't have any hunger pangs despite eating just once a day. I feel great.

I try to be more of an optimist too. I've flung the grey areas out of the window and my outlook on life is vivid and picturesque. Somehow i still am susceptible to mood swings and my temperament is nowhere subdued. Haha.

I am really looking forward to the last semester where i will complete the eighth and final module, plus my Graduation Project. That means i can progress to some other qualifications at some other institutions. I am doing Police Studies in TP in April. Don't ask me. I advocate lifelong learning. Studying is my hobby. The hobby that keeps me on my toes, makes my mind active, keeps me grounded in society, defined who i really am, enticed me with utter interest and something that is able to portray me as a civilized, cultured and a classy individual. I am boring you with academic talks, haven't i?

I yearn for an honest opinion. I have toyed with the idea of shaving bald. No, i am not affiliated with some religious organizations and doing it for some rituals. I want a fresh new look. I have been wearing my spiky hair for a long time. The only hairstyle that i find uber-cool. But everyone knows when my mane is unkempt and not gelled for the day, it's a sign that i am not in a 'gay' mood. I guess i will look okay being botak because the Pulau Tekong barber made me realized of being so, back during National Service.

I want to scan old photographs and save it in flash form. I mean not tangible as you would hold it in your hands. I have this all-in-one machine that scans, prints, photocopy and stuff. But the only thing i have figured thus far to operate is the photocopy part. I don't know what the other buttons can and will do. Can you believe that i had this bloody machine for three years and i am still a tech-idiot?

Shush. This is not a good thursday. My psp's charger is faulty, my anal anatomy is sore and my bedroom looks akin to a stable. Clothes, CDs, Magazines and books are in a disarray. Used clothes are strewn and they haven't gone to the laundry's. The room looked like it has been hit by Hurricane Katrina, Typhoon Nargis and El Nino and La Nina. All at once. Oprah, hear my tragedy and get someone to help clean it up!

On a more bitter note, i will not hesitate to severe ties with friends who are insolent, rude, speak to me immaturely, in a harsh tone or ill-mannered way. I have dropped friends TOTALLY from my Facebook, Friendster, Tagged or from my life for that matter and i don't have any remorse or regret whatsoever. Even if i have been friends with that person for over 10 years, i have no qualms in disposing the good memories out, together with the stinking attitude towards me. I don't apologize for things that i've said because i don't speak whatever that hangs at the tongue and in casual fashion. I speak with my mind, i choose my words carefully and i think before i speak. Get out of the room if you can't stand the heat.

If that's too hot for any of you, perhaps you can take off your clothes for starters? A hot sex is way better than a heated talk.

I think it's hot when someone calls me a bitch. Or 'you suck' - to quote from Eric Tan Keng Yong. I always tell him 'i don't suck. I'm top'. Waaa.....

Save Me From Myself

Clocks are ticking in a sluggish pace. I can't persuade these eyes to shut and isolate the computer. My mind is inane of any words and thoughts. I stare blankly at the screen. The fingers are conjuring essays but the mind wandered into a relative unknown dimension. I strived to collect my thoughts but the spirit and physical vessel are detached like forlorn paramours.

My train of thoughts are obscure. I am disoriented. I have to retrieve my effervescent self. I have to summon my spirit home. I have to wage a battle against demons in my head from manipulating my battered soul. I have to restore the faith and not be ambivalent in my strength to combat dire circumstances.

I am unsure of where i am heading with this post. But i need salvation from destruction and put things right back in its place. I have strayed and gone astray. I need to rehabilitate myself and be the person i see looking back at me in the mirror. Unlike the person i have composed to be, here in my mind and there in your sub-conciousness. I have to come out and smell the petals of the fragrant flowers. I want to be vindicated. I want to do something for me without the perils of disrepute. I have to halt the biasness and discrimination. I want to live like a hummingbird uninhabited by a birdcage.

Will an open arms be reached in time to catch my fall? Will i find the elusive happiness? Will this contentment be perennial or merely a dream that can sustain only in my sleep? Wake me up and say that i am not disenchanted. You have come to fulfill me. - Eddie Yusoff

A Red-Defining Moment

Happy Lunar New Year to my chinese and buddhist friends. And happy holidays to all.

I hope no merrymakers are greeted with a melancholic and sombre mood. The global recession may be a downcast for many affected. Still, when it is time to revel in the festivities, come on in out of the rain and savor the good times. Cast all worries, problems and sorrows aside for a moment and get in tune with the celebrations. It's a frigid attempt but if you can't be happy, try not to make the person next to you feel rotten and subjecting them to a samilar treatment. Don't spoil the broth, pal.

I guess the chinese calendar of 2009 being the year of the ox is somehow a dogma that states 'the ox is supposedly a hardworking animal, treading the pastures and reap good produce for farmers'. It emphasize on the need to remain diligent in the face of the economic downturn and the rewards will be in abundance if one's energy and hard work are invested in his career.

I have not quite feel the pinch of the recession. Apart from segregating needs and wants with conscientious effort, i had come to a conclusion of deviating from exuberant spending, buying what i only need and embedding this mantra - if it is still good for use, don't throw it away. Every luxury items that i desired to own (car, x-box360, psp slim, a touch screen phone, etc.) are already in possession and the wanting now is - to meet the extravagance taste that i have - designer goods that is. That can wait for now. When i get back into the job market and scale my new career, i will certainly go on a spree and indulge in John Galliano, Alexander McQueen, Jean Paul Gaultier, Moschino and the works. I need a messenger bag badly.

I need to go get a life from here on. I am fixated with the pc, been burying my big head in my textbooks, go for classes, have sinful late night supper with family and friends and routinely go for nightly runs. It's a desolate life. How i wish i could go meet new people. Or find out things that i can be good at without me knowing it. Or drive the whole of Singapore and understanding the roads without getting lost for once (getting from Pasir Ris to Bedok can reduce me to a crybaby). Or maybe stab random people on the crotch with Bobbi Brown eye pencils in the streets and making a dash for it. Or steal a cabby's phone and run off with it. Or try setting some prominent figure on fire. Or finding out how many of the 400 plus contacts that i have have actually retain their given numbers without me calling and getting response of obselete numbers?

Whatever floats my boat. Have a wonderful monday. The only monday that is wonderful for once. I am going to rob my neighbour's kumquats at the corridor and pressing on doorbells and disappearing. Baa.

Confessions Of A Rebel

It's the weekend. And the only reasonable thing i did was the night jog. Apart from that, it's the second time in a span of TWO days that i indulged in fast food. I need to shed the calories with sheer immediacy because i don't wish to pile back what i have burned off. I am narcissistic. I have to look good in order to feel good. I gotta lay out plans that entails sports for the forthcoming holidays. A swim at Sentosa's Pahlawan Beach sounds engaging. But i reckon it'll be densely populated with holidaymakers thronging Sentosa in the next couple of days. If it doesn't pan out i will revisit my routine - run. It's gratifying to be soaked in sweat, man.

Time to digest a bit of useless information. I abhor clubs. Why does it everytime i have had to fend off perplexing questions like 'Have you been to Zirca?', 'You wanna go St. James?', 'I hear a UK deejay is spinning at Butter Factory. Join me?' Hated it. Just because i have thousands of songs in collection and i pop hip-hop and R&B club banging tracks in my car's player ever too often does not translate to me being a partying whore. I tell you why. I never understand house/dance/lounge music, i don't advocate alcohol consuming (nothing to do with the being a muslim context) because i hated the smell, i don't find cigarette smoke inhalation thrilling, i don't wish to jostle with the crowds in a chock-full space, i dread watching people who can't dance for nuts, i hate juveniles congregating in those joints, i can't stand tramps, vixens and sluts cajoling men with moolahs, and some clubbers believed they are hot and can snag a catch darn easily and please, live bands DO NOT engage me. Almost always the deafening instruments drowned out all vocal delivery attempt. However, only a club that has a stand up comic in its repertoire gets a nod. Or maybe a drag show can provide some entertainment of sorts. In a comic sense so i can cackle in wild abandon.

I want to share with you a fascinating story told by Mr. San. I could not verify when and where this transpired but i shall tell you as it is, based on my understanding. A student candidate were given an exam question of writing an essay of 'Tell me what do you know about courage/Cite an example where courage plays in in your life'. That student got an A. His only answer was 'THIS IS COURAGE'. Because he brazenly wrote a three liner on a question that requires few hundred words for an answer. Amazing. Read it again and you'll get the drift. I could pull the same stunt for my Human Mass Comm papers should a question like 'What are the ways to communicate well and making your point across?' be posed. I would leave a blank for an answer. Because silence is always the best form of communication to project what you intend to say. Then i would get an A too. Or A whack of my mom's stilettos for wasting the thousands of dollars paying for my studies.

A Digestable Read

Hello, rabid fans of mine. Thanks for keeping tabs on my posts. I am a little worn right now. I just got home from Human Mass Comm class. Boy was i pleasantly surprised to have Mr. San as the lecturer conducting the module. He taught me Public Relations last year. He is relatively congenial and really, he rocks! Man, i can anticipate a rewarding NINE weeks of classes. The flipside is the small number of students attending this module for this semester this time around. Plus no hot classmates to ogle, idolise and take a fancy on...sob, sob. Anyway the key points that i have learnt are happiness and love cannot be defined and put into words. It's ineffable if i am unmistaken. Indeed. Just wondering, why am i seeing a substantial number of firefighters taking Mass Comm as my classmates? I don't quite see the relevancy. Can anyone enlighten me?

I am going to keep today's post short. Damn. My stomach feels bloated with the blasphemous McDonald's meal that i had at West Coast Park with a friend a short while ago. It's such a long drive home traversing AYE, ECP, PIE, GST, COE...God! I'd popped on a rad cd on the player and blasted the volume and sang along like a loon along the highway. I get stares but so what! Beating the humdrums of long distance travelling i say...You know, i saw a cat's carcass next to the road shoulder, on the fourth lane. It was repulsive to sight. All blood and innards. Apparently it was ran over. I was a bit taken aback and skillfully manoeuvered my car so as not to do the same. I mean, screw the cat, i don't want bloodied tyres and flesh chunks splattered on my car. It's a bitch to go to the car wash you know. Before i digress any further, i think i will put a dot here. I need a cold shower. I need a hot sex. I need a warm blanket. I need the room to be freezing so i can have a nice sleep...

Kitty Kat

Err...Woof? This is a bonus track. Eddie is away on a safari trip to Madagascar. I will blog in his place. I am Casper. Hated that name. I am ang moh. Can't you see my furry colour and blue eyes? I don't roll or backstroke like my owner claimed. Leceh you know? They think i am a three year old boy? I like to catwalk around the house but too bad nobody gives a hoot. I took this picture myself and set it on timer. After 848 takes, i finally got the shot. I used his desk as the set. I don't meow like my other friends. I go 'Breeouw!' Eddie and the family is fazed too. They don't understand my language. I mean hello dumbass, it's Icelandic! But i use the same word everytime i want to eat, pee, poo, enter in any of the 4 bedrooms. I don't sleep in Eddie's room. But they always put me on the top layer of the double decker bed in the next room. I kena jump down myself if i want to go have dinner and stuff. I'm scared of heights. Super scary. Lucky for nine lives. I would have died if i was a dog. I think it's because they don't want me to stray out of the house and hump the hot and bitchin' chihuahua who lives on the 12th floor. What more can i ask for? I sleep with the air-con on, i eat expensive food and i don't have to worry about recession, paying income tax and struggle with a job...Ok, i better stop. I want to listen to Eddie's mp3 now. I hope to find a Mariah Carey song. Or Celine Dion. What? Can't a boy dig sentimentals? I punch you and bite your crotch if you think i'm gay...Woof! Woof! Sorry...Breeouw.

Sing It Loud & Proud

This clip was taken back in end of 2007, during our unit's team function at a Changi chalet. I sang a Malay song titled - Harapan (Hope). This is for the inquistive minds who desires to know if i can indeed carry a tune. Just a short video for your viewing pleasure.

The List Goes On

Hello. This is my 50th entry. I thought i better jot something down here before i turn into a recluse and devoid myself of any entries these few days. The normalcy of things entails me blogging in the evenings when i have a clear understanding of the day's going ons. However it is an exception for now. In case amnesia gets me good, i will not impede the things that are on the edges of my lips. Henceforth another bout of Top 25 Fashion Crimes that will round up the list. I need to take a stab at certain individual, who have the audacity to label me. The nerve of T.K.Y! Prepare for the onslaught, mate. You're Numero Uno.

1. Skinny jeans is so SALAH (is this the miseducation of mats and minahs of Tampines Blk 223? ) 2. Botox-faced, aged socialites attending balls in expensive gowns...please la auntie, why would a John Galliano look va va voom on your pigmented, crinkly, sagging skin? even ah peks popping 4 bottles of viagra can't get it up looking at you 3. Dick Lee (you are NEVER hot to begin with okay...whoever anointed you a fashion icon must have a degenerative sight and severe astigmatism. indeed you're a mad chinaman. Very The Pecah!) 4. Picture this - red shoes, blue top, green handbag - you get miss-matched get-ups. Aksi Mat Yoyo days are over, honey 5. The hideous colourful glasses frames that those malay ITE students wear! My God! Lightning strike me! Twice if you can! 6. Below the knees, oversized school blouse on primary/secondary school girls (what do you keep under the skirt? your pooch dog, Spock? a whole cabinet of encyclopedia? a makeup kit? a kia picanto car?) 7. LIME GREEN on anything. I can see someone wearing this obiang colour at Plaza Singapura from my bedroom window here in Pasir Ris. super striking 8. Malaysian Airlines steward's uniform (bow tie is already teruk. plus the faint green hue makes everything so kesian) 9. The cheap Blue + white slippers that you can get at provision shop for less than 2 bucks MUST be banned in public. it sits next to the toilet bowl dammit! you think it is a peranakan/nyonya beaded slippers that you can flaunt in public ah? 10. Macho marys aka muscled gay boys in snug singlets...one more kesian case...face so crack, still brazen enough to go cruising in malls' washrooms...right, that's where you fit right in...TOILETS 11. Grown up boys don't wear shorts (either you are an ACS Boys' student in the rugby team or you a sissy spokey dot who thinks you are Jolin Tsai 12. Girls looking like boys (not everybody looks like Ellen DeGeneres my dear...you just look like an angry butch who has never seen a dick prolly ever in your life...) 13. SMRT pink uniforms. enuff' said 14. Fat boys with spiky hair (think - a poisonous puffer fish) 15. The invention of bodysuit (what? now women or gay men can't ogle at hotbods in trunks at the pool no more?) 16. People with pubic-hair type/fine curly hair (what you lack is a penis and scrotums and balls on your head) 17. Men clad in jerseys in public (do people wear swimming trunks in public? LEAVE sports attire at home or in the playing field. you look like a cock rather than Kaka) 18. Torn bottom end of jeans (so unsexy - yo, i'm talking to you you woodlands centre cheena bengs) 19. Hawaiian shirts (i guess you want to look like a Russian tourist getting lost in Lucky Plaza) 20. Women who has hint of moustache or facial hair (chewbacca wants a chat with you...) 21. Stained front teeth on smokers (here's my boots. or you want me to throw it at your mouth?) 22. Wearing bermudas or t-shirts to a wedding (Eddie shakes his head until his mouth emits foams due to convulsion and seizure) 23. T-shirts with damn loose collars (all you need is a bowl and a venue to beg) 24. The muay thai/kickboxing boxers that young men wear is an extreme eyesore 25. Bells as accessories (everytime i hear it i kept thinking the cow and bovine has returned home to be slaughtered. gets my goat! And it also reminds me of my cat casper coming to me when i say - here fei mao, good boy...now flip!roll!bounce!backstroke!)

There you have it ladies, gentlemen, bitches and drag queens. A disclaimer. I don't resent people of such nature but it's just me being critical as always. But they better stand FIVE football fields away from me. Get over it. Obama is king. Liberalism in Singapore will not go to the dogs and i shall say what i deemed fit. To T.K.Y, it's really one of the things i am pointing out and wanted to add in the first part but didn't. But you carry it off dude. It's just a scare tactic. Call me unjust names and i write another 50 of Resentment list - ALL ABOUT YOU. =)

Great Expectations

Wee. I am ecstatic. The Techniques of Professional Speaking & Writing looks promising. It encapsulates the one element that i think i can ace - art of language. It was an amalgamation of grammar, vocabulary, adjectives and what-have-you that you have learnt back in primary school. It's a refreshing start. The brain juice floodgates have opened and this time i think the flow will be placid and serene. I'm getting a good vibe about this module. I hope i won't derail this time around, like i did last semester. Previous posts can attest to the trainwreckage and abysmal state of mind i was in then. The lecturer is fabulous. I think we can gel well. Speaking of gel, i can't help but wonder the authenticity of the lecturer's mane. It looks stiff and did not moved an inch. I swear to God! On the other side of the coin, I am looking forward to presentation day. The core topic stems from the word - skills. I have this in the bag. I do know what i am putting forth. Just wait. Just wait.

Well, someone became chattier i see. It's good. Because a person who exudes grief and front an austere persona can inadvertently inflict the same vibe to his surroundings. I mean, if you see someone who gibbers on grief and grim issues, you figure if there is any way at all you can render help of sorts, to make the mood more uplifting. Or try to put things back on the right track. Ultimately you will get dispirited too, when that person does not want to laugh or talk to you on an amiable basis. I hope i won't have to listen to the grump chiding his modules or his life for that matter, anymore. No more drama, no more pain. You hear me, uncle?

I need to clear the hazy air here for once. To a classmate named AKEEFAHS*, thank you for taking a fancy on me and blogging about how i have touched your life one way or another. Thanks for the good stuff that you wrote about me throughout. However, i have only treated you as a friend and i harbour zero feelings for you. I refrained from getting close because you might develop progressive feelings - the last thing you wanna do is fly higher and fall harder. I really appreciate the warm attention but please divert the focus elsewhere. You have a great life ahead of you and do open up to more people. Meet great people you never thought exist in your life and try to assimilate with people you never thought in a million years you would mix with. You may find a gem amidst it all. Thank you and sorry for this admission.

Finally, today is dearest momma 48th Birthday. I want to thank you for bringing me up to be the person i am today. You gave love, strength, education, support, meaning for living and so much more. You have shaped me to be somebody you can be proud of. Everything you gave is undivided. I promise nothing but the best for you. Thank you for the times when you tide me over on the tumultuous moments of my life. For example - when i am caught in financial dire straits. You motivate me to soldier on. Your love is unconditional. Your words became my virtue. For all that and forever more - I love you, mom.

Fashion Bible

The TOP 25 fashion crimes:-

1. Wearing shirts or dresses with threads hanging off 2. Spotting someone wearing the same clothes at a function/events 3. Crocs sandals (super skanky) 4. Bell-bottom jeans (malaysian teens are fans - oh lord!) 5. Ponytails on grown up women (what? you think you're strawberry shortcake?) 6. Nose hair sticking out (bro, national geographic wants to do a documentary on spiders with you) 7. Bushy underarms on women (hello, peidu mamas) 8. Long fingernails on men (lin ching hsia called - she wants her nails back) 9. Chapped and dry lips 10. Skin coloured bra/panties (stop rummaging your granny's closet) 11. Fake/Authentic Anya Hindmarch's 'I'm not a plastic bag' bag 12. Ah-beng sideburns 13. Obese people in tight clothings, accentuating flab contours 14. Heavy makeup (TIED)with Blue eyeshadows 15. T-shirts with profanities and skeleton prints (very obit) 16. Funky body odours (you want some of my Dior Homme?) 17. Indian women wearing saris to practically everywhere 18. Stupid youths doing Cosplay 19. People who can't shave properly (spotted: single strand of hair sticking out amid a clean shaved patch) 20. Red hair on dark/fair skinned women (unless you want to look like a Texas soccer mom) 21. Tourists wearing knock-off Singapore Airlines kebayas at Changi Airport 22. People using conspicuous colored contact lens, trying to look beyond asian (blue or green, for example - The Grinch alert) 23. People who speak in put-on/deliberate American accent 24. People with horrid dress sense 25. Women toting Python/Crocodile skin bags (why would anyone think carcasses of reptiles are a must have?)...and a bonus track, presenting No. 26 - Dawn Yeoh/Wendy Cheng aka Xiaxue acting nippon cute, harajuku style.

These are solely my prerogatives of views and my opinion shall not be contradicted. I am not liable for any victims of the mentioned criminal acts expressing interest in a sue and slander pursuit. I will lobby for these acts to be deemed an offence, thus carrying a punishment of at least FORTY years imprisonment and subjected to rehabilitation in the form of watching David Gan's excruciating to sight fashion sense and a tormenting sit out for a day at CITY PLAZA on sunday witnessing off day maids in halter-necks, bare backs and toga tops.

A night out at the karaoke joint. Here i am, emotionally charged, deafening the evening away, releasing pent-up feelings and seeking material comfort in a microphone. A mike that can offer a sense of tranquil, amid a barrage of frust and woes, providing a reprieve from the motley of daft, insane and laborious forthcoming semester.

The Writings On The Wall

I am inundated with American Idol fever. It's never to scoff and jibe at appalling talents who can't carry a tune but i am mostly fixated with undiscovered gems who can inspire me. You know, the part when the African American women who has astounding vocal instruments make you hair stand on ends with such dynamic delivery. Anyway it's harrowing to hear that Singapore Idol will be reprised later this year. Because i am wondering will it be a breakthrough or a breakdown should i participate. Let's leave it out of the way for now. I'll take care of that.

I wanna revisit the days when i used to be a brand-concious fashionista. I remember going to school in secondary three carrying my Jean Paul Gaultier bag. Then i can recall the Dolce & Gabanna, Gianni Versace's Versus and Emporio Armani spectacles that i wore throughout my secondary days. It was a damn big deal back in those days okay. It was partly to pose to fellow students. Haha. Nah, truth is i used to model and act in few local shows. I did a Toyota commercial once too. You can figure already where the expense comes from...

So there, a bit of the past for your reading pleasure. Before you ask me again, i don't do acting or modelling stuff anymore. That talent agency has defunct too. Ha...Now i sing for life. It doesn't pay but it makes me contented surrounding the audience with my vocal credibility. Your whole life story can be told in the song you sing. Aah...The power of a voice...Maybe my big break is in the distant future. I shall wait with patience and opportunity. Perhaps i can go into the porn industry if all that does not work out. Watch out Jenna Jameson...get Lukas Ridgeston to clear the set on your way out too. =)

My Unbridled Pursuit

Everything that made the news thus far encompass the golden word - EDUCATION. From the release of the GCE 'O' LEVEL results to the chap who got bitch-punched by an assailant at a convocation to the sole Government Scholar Singaporean 'hunk' who is in the running for Harvard's Freshman challenge stuff. I read how these high flyers overcome the odds to be the top students and almost always, people who attain success are the ones with a grey-themed background. Past of truancy, entertaining grievances over the loss of a family member in the midst of examinations, coping with ill-health, how someone who never made the grade suddenly took the top spot in class/school and people who has severe drought on self-esteem turned into inspiration themselves.

This is why i must emphasise to the youths out there to get back to the books and make good of their lives. It is tres' important to own an academic knowledge. It's even blissful to possess that sought after certs. I have an intense aversion towards these adolescents/young adults squandering their time at the coffeeshops, malls and void decks, spoiling for a spar or two, sporting tattoos, donning a themed concept of dressing and making a fracas with total oblivion. Wouldn't it be a serious fun to be in a classroom instead?You make friends(with the hottest classmates for all i care), you gain immeasurable amount of knowledge, you get your certificate at the end of the day and you land a good job thereafter. How enticing is that?

I am into lifelong learning. I am not your elite and exactly an ace in the deck of cards. Neither am i a struggling fellow who is at the bottom of the ladder. I am simply your average student. One who has taken a vow to pursue academic excellence till the last of breaths. I read a lot everyday. I will be in a rapt silence in my Straits Times read, carefully reading between the lines. I love reading the dictionary too. Because i need to learn ONE new word everyday. One can always pepper extravagant words in their daily conversations. With the repercussion of people lambasting you of trying to sound American, or trying to act smart of course. I will be the one who is more intellectual in any ways. People who speak well leaves a good impression on others too. It's true, dear readers. For now, i will try to focus on my studies with little or less distraction, sans the whining as well. It's a heavy price to pay for the virility and constitution but that's okay. It's a process of finding your strength, understanding your weakness and knowing your limits. And it would be a compliment to be tagged beauty with brains ain't it? Have a good wednesday, sons.

I am just being a cam-whore today. I'm testing my new mobile phone and gave you a shot to look at the same time right ? No ramblings or posts today. I'm tired out after my run, people!

Turn A Page

I finally see the beauty of the sun. The heaviness in my heart and weight in mind has ceased to exist and now i have room in them to house the better things in life. I've been faltering of late. I blame it on my second semester, which has thankfully ended. It's been an arduous journey. But the experience has taught me to use my strength and realize my weakness. Oh, no more of woeful posts. Enough of twisted entries. I am not going to be exuding negative vibes anymore. I am drilling more insightful, beautiful and meaningful facets of life. I am starting on a fresh page and the next chapter will be by far, an enchanting read. And the fairytale begins...

The Social Behavioural Studies exam paper yesterday was not that tough. It wasn't that easy either. You just gotta do an essay in your own understanding about the psychology in Man. I wrote mother goose bedtime stories. The marker can get lullabied, yawn and fell asleep reading it. Haha...I hope Ranbir Singh won't get mad at me for not being able to fathom his module because I AM doing his GP in the last semester. Well a classmate and i, lets call him R, at his request, had a mini celebration of our own. To unwind after the paper ended. We went to hotspots. Places where vice is rampant. Nah, not trying to get ourselves lucky. But exploring gems that are untouched by Government's laws and enforcements. I am talking about Geylang, Changi Village and Fort Road. We had a blazing good time experimenting. It was something mad that i'd never done before, as in chatting up, getting picked up and pick upon. No scandalous intent though. I can get lucky anytime. I don't need to resort to that. But we have plans for more encounters. Can someone slap some sense on us already? =)

It's a good day. I'm gonna indulge in good food because my palate is on the active. I'm thinking of a swim at Pasir Ris Beach but the last i heard it is closed for a year because of some contamination in its waters. Driving to Sentosa is a bitch with the undergoing constructions. Changi is overrated. If that's not working out, i will prolly give my legs a good ol' run later in the day. Ou, or should i have a badminton duel with a friend? Shopping with an empty pocket sounds retarded. Whatever i am up to, it's gonna be a fabulous saturday. I need to enjoy my break before i start on a new career, in the airline industry? Later, kids.

Born Fighter

Why am i still in a state of doldrums? I am supposed to be relieved because i will be having the final paper tomorrow. Despite the umpteenth time whining about the exams, i am still feeling these inhibitions that i don't think i could shake off soon. It's prolly the cursed Dynamics of Mass Comm paper that i took in the afternoon that rendered me hapless and furnished me with anxieties, regret and despair.

It's a bit disheartening to see fellow classmates trickling down in numbers as the clock ticked furiously in the THREE hours calamity. Some had walked out even under an hour. I guess they've given up on penning essays and bullshits. Hats off. But i did put up a fight until the very last minute. It is indeed what it is. Dynamic. Everything that i thought i knew somehow got lost in translation and i was stumped over several questions. I just can't recall. Oh well, no point lamenting. It's done. I would just await by the mailbox a couple of months from now and see what the school decides to give me. I would anticipate a D. Or refund my school fees. Ha...

Psst...the invigilator actually stepped up to me and say 'your handwriting is very nice'. Why thank you miss. It's not the first compliment. But it's a first to have an invigilator reading your answers and making comments. Tsk. Whisper me the answer next time yeah? See, i made myself smile.

Beautiful Disaster

I think i am suffering from sleep disorder. With the population in deep slumber, here i am wide awake and trawling websites to feed my insatiable hunger pangs for new music videos and songs, news bites and loads of youtube flicks...It's ludacris. I don't get much sleep. Neither do i sleep a lot. I have done extensive damage to my constitution. Enough said. I don't know what it'll takes to restore my vitality. Researches, revisions, late night suppers, night runs, nocturnal behaviour and late sleeping has turned me into a maniac. I need to eschew from these habits soon. But i'll keep the first two and the night runs. I need to be sedated and sobered up soon because i know it has inflicted the people around me as well for entertaining my erratic behaviour. And you thought excessive alcohol is the only thing that can morph people into an instant debacle.

On the top note of the fragrance, i am aghast, in an amused kinda way. Like as in WTF. I realized just yesterday that MDIS' day students are a repulsive bunch. Ugly dressing sense, bad hair, non-gorgeous types, unsightly to sight and you fill in the blanks. It seems most of the pretty boys and girls are those doing part-time evening studies. No wonder a recent poll showed the gorgeous breeds are those in Polytechnics and Universities. Now i am embarassed to go to school. Is this the effect of the enforcement of strict dress code that made the news? Dressing down doesn't mean dressing like clowns you trolls. Even if you look nothing like Adam Chen or Felicia Chin does not give you the right to walk in public in your bedroom look. At the very least wear something nice can? If i were a disciplinary member i would send my henchmen, armed with catapults, on the prowl in the school compound and shoot these rodents like crows.

Damn, i need to stop hating and start loving a bit more. Wait, i am digressing :( I don't want to see my world in a black, white and grey perspective like Eric does. But what i am seeing is a picturesque vision going on a kaleidoscope kinda way. You know, like a constant change in patterns of shapes and colours. If only the world can stop turning so i can relish the beauty and fancies of it. Only a dream can accomodate to this humble request. Nites.

Phoenix Rising

I am exhausted from all the frantic revisions. It is giving me an unwelcomed migraine. I mean i have my itineraries carefully laid out for the whole week and the last thing i need is a splitting headache to propel me towards being a trainwreck. When i am reeling from such indisposition, i will emote aggressiveness and antagonistic behavior. My attitude towards people will have adverse effects. It will take me so much to restore my composure in the aftermath of the ire.

Sometimes it is hard not to get fuming mad at trivial issues. I am easily irritated. I have a swinging mood that can shapeshift me at the snap of a finger. I don't wish to communicate with absolute anyone when i am in a momentarily seclusion. I will hurl hurtful words when people step up to me and ask what's bothering me, even if it is out of concern. I mean, leave me alone when i am incensed. It may transduced into a disorder i guess. Or perhaps mismanagement of emotions. Whatever it is, i have a lax control on anger. I am not physically aggressive though. But what is worrying is i will be of a different individual when i am angry. Maybe like Jean Grey aka Phoenix, wrecking havoc when in wrath.

You can say i am in a sullen mood at the moment. Things are not looking up. Could it be the ill-preparation for the impending exams? Have i strapped an agenda-ladened timebomb on myself? Or is it because i have few unfulfilled missions yet to be accomplished? I am leaning on faith and living on hope that the sun will shine after the rain. God, i need your strength.

Dance Of The Decadence

Supper with TWO of my bestest sisters - Adila & Chelsea was akin to a revelry. We had a good laugh in deriding each and every soul we know in mind and bitched with total abandon. I really enjoyed their companionship because they understand me like they would on a bestseller book. I have confided the utmost of emotions and shared my life stories to them trustingly. Likewise for them. I guess we bonded in a 'yaya-sisterhood' kinda way. I have zilch understanding of the meaning man. Anyway the spaghetti was dope! Thanks guys!

Well i had sweated buckets traversing all 4km or so at Bedok Reservoir park earlier. My vigor had somehow dissipated along with my perspiration upon the 2km mark. It felt like i was driving on a punctured tyre. My ECA back in high school was athletics. It's a far cry from what i used to attempt, for instance, the annual Cross Country. I'm just a sorry state now, conceding defeat and not able to keep the pace with Nawi, who had reached the finishing point like half an hour prior? That suckling bitch! But the intense badminton friendly that we had a little later was the killer. I am feeling the lethargy and muscle strain now. I shall sleep it off and hopefully it won't be too taxing to pump the pedals when i drive out later in the day...As for my sunday's plan, i am staying in to be in the company of textbooks because tuesday is the first of three papers that i am taking for the whole week. Until the next post, excuse moi.

Stand Out to Fit In

I earnestly think that i would religiously abide to my resolutions. This time around, i would leave no stones unturned. It would be a relentless pursuit to achieve my longing aspirations. I am saying no to procrastination, i will not conform to fate knowing one can write his one destiny, i will not let a dream be just a dream, i shall oppose to conventional ways of thinking, i am going to be much stronger than before, be wiser than a renaissance man and come out a fighter in the face of adversities.
I discovered this profound philosophy 'You need to Stand Out to Fit In' from a TV show last night. You echoed my understanding of it? It means one must be distinct and stand apart from the rest in order to fit in the requirements, pre-requisites and criteria. Well, it applies to every aspect in your life actually. I hope it resonates well with you as it did with me. Have a good friday.

Fresh & Sexy New Year

Have a fabulous 2009 everyone...babes, hunks, divas, dorks, bitches, losers...