25 MORE Issues That Gets My Goat...Part III
I HATE THE PART WHEN...
1. People flashes their middle finger in photographs(you look fcuking uneducated)
2. Subaru/Mazda car owners often revved on the roads(especially on the roads where you have coffeeshops along it. i hope you crash and get burnt alive, fcuking pigs)
3. Sometimes, whenever we tried to order something we craved to eat at a food outlet(usually a prata shop), the indian server would say the food has run out or they don't sell it or they only serve it at a certain timing. Then don't hand me the menu, you poisonous toad.
4. Some lifts at the shopping malls are super slow in ascending or descending. Like, I don't have the whole of wednesday to wait for this, dammit. It is especially fcuking annoying when after you've waited so long to enter, crowds soon formed and when the lift opens, there are like the whole residents of Marsiling in it, thus cutting you out and making you wait all over again.
5. The patriach of the family in some melodramatic channel 8 dramas, suffers a heart attack when the family feud gets bitter or when he discovered something unsettling. I can almost tell you myself what happens after that. BITCH.
6. The petrol/convenience store cashiers will go - 'Sir, you want to buy another curry puff? Got promotion'. Or 'A GPS System or MP3/DVD player for you, sir?' Give me my bloody change and what makes you think i want to buy a DVD player to go with my petrol? Ask me again and i pump the petrol in your mouth and set you on fire. Irritating scumbags.
7. People who don't pick up my calls, then sms me seconds or minutes later and ask 'You called?' Like, er, no. I think some poltergeist possessed me and made me hit the digits on my cellphone to call you. YOU DICK. If i am going to die and tried reaching for you, will you sms me later and ask me if i called? Where is your sense of urgency? If it was something casual wouldn't i just sms?
8. The Pasir Ris' Singapore Post Office customer service staff treat its customer so shabbily that i thought i have owed them a few dollars, hence the grim, nasty and sullen look that they wear when they served customers. It's not my fcuking fault you DID NOT get it last night, lady. He's just not that into you.
9. China-made cellphones or products infiltrate our markets. *shakes head and lapses into a perennial coma*
10. If i have to hear Hady Mirza's song 'You Give Me Wings', sung by anyone again, i swear i will migrate to Cambodia. The song sounds like a bad national day song, with its tacky lyrics, worthy to be a school anthem for some girls' school in Bedok.
11. Ken Lim's 'Come slap me with your ALDO shoes on my face' look on Singapore Idol. Like, hello? You are judging and making comments to contestants to improve themselves. Don't get bitchy and get regimental like it is some Boot Camp. I would have signed on in the army if i want to hear sergeants on periods or PMS. I would have flung my mic at you if you say 'I'm kryptonite, you're superman'.
12. The over-rated and over-hyped Britain's Got Talent's Susan Boyle and the appearance of Suria's Anugerah winner Hyrul Anuar singing at EVERY Suria shows. Get the hell out of my TV screen. It may look like a day job to you, but seeing you whenever i turn on the TV, i can die from ear,nose and eye bleed.
13. Straight guy friends go 'eee...gay sia' and discriminate PLUs gender BUT, in reality, you see them picking up trannies in Changi for a quick fix. Like, trannies are men too, mothefcukas. Technically, it's men fcuking men. What gives???
14. People who pick their teeth during meals. It's so uncouth, ungracious and impolite. Where is your etiqutte and table manners, you dog?
15. You get stopped on your tracks at the MRT station every other day by some insurance and bank officers who tries to ask you buy insurance plans, savings policy with their organization and whatnot. You required THREE minutes of my time to hear you speak. But you don't want my TWO seconds for me to say NO THANKS to you. I curse your parents the next time you force me to buy policies from you. What makes you think i will want an insurance policy on a random day? How to part with a part of my life-savings on the spot? Same goes to you donation collectors for your heartbreaking stories of former convicts who needs support 'cos they can't get a job. My problem, issit?
16. The residents in my block are having some OTT spiritual congregation. As in you have to bear with the weekly LOUD gospel singing with its tuneless guitar strumming by some students who thinks my flat is the Rock Auditorium, to the banging of the gongs and drums of the malay dance troupe that makes a din every sunday. Please be considerate, la. The C.Cs are not built for ah-sohs who wants to be a Mississipi cowboy for their line-dancing practice, you know. And i am not even going to touch on the horrible woman with the more horrible voice who sings her weekly Ziana Zain karaoke songs. I seriously don't know if a pet dog is often heard being abused in her house or she is being possessed in broad daylight by the ghost of a heartbroken singing pontianak.
17. Changi Airport and its perpetual construction and refurbishment plans. It's like soon after one renovation is complete, another one gets underway. What more do you want? The best airport in the whole fcuking universe?
18. People who uses Top Up cards. I just don't get the concept of buy a card and scratch it for you to top-up your value. Can somebody tell me what the hell is that?
19. Women who sports curly-maggie hair. Wait, if that is not nasty enough, it has to be coloured red or blonde. Position for Getai performers application has closed la, sister. Try applying next august. Or the KTV in Geylang is hiring beer aunties. Very Horrigible, hor.
20. Companies or agencies employ frontline staff who cannot execute a proper usage of the english language. I was at CMPB a few months ago and the aunties, yes aunties, manning the counters were happily conversing to customers in 'market' singlish. I can almost visualize she had taugehs, pandan leaves and roasted ducks next to her counter wanting to 'lelong-ing' them.
21. Radio Ria's Misteri Jam 12. It is essentially a horror-themed segment whereby listeners call in and share stories of ghostly encounters, the supernatural and paranormal activities. It seems, every night, so many people would want to share their experience. To put it simply, it seems everyone is gifted to see the dead. What the fcuk. Truly an over-rated show. The only ghostly figures i am able to see my whole life is the makcik who lives on the tenth floor with the Anita Sarawak make-up and her equally flamboyant daughter. Imagine the scared shit moments when you bumped into them in the lifts. Very the Jigsaw you know, Saw's clown-masked killer. But Times TWO uh.
22. Ris Low. I mean, how can i not mention her? Only for the fact she has degraded the standard of MDIS students. I can't find Hospeetality block leh. Same goes to Pilar Arlando who said the Merlion became extinct in 1965. And please hor, Ris did not coined the word BOOMZ. 'Cos the malay trangender community has long used that word. It's called - 'Meletup, nyah.' Hahahahaha...
23. Friends who ask me to rate them how they look or yearning compliments from me when we go shopping. Sometimes, when they take a bloody long time trying on outfits, i would chip in and say ''that is so gorgeous, it so fits you to a T, i would buy it myself if i have that kind of money.'' In reality, i want to say hurry up and get the fcuk out of the store, you cunt. You look like Free Willy being washed ashore and i also seriously think you look like an road accident victim. So kesian. :p
24. MRT stations with absurd names - Joo Koon. Ha. Jelapang. Haha. Kangkar. Hahaha... What's next? Next stop - Keparat?
25. Duane Ho wins Singapore Idol. Then all Singaporeans should migrate to Planet Jupiter. I am starting to pack my underwears liao. Waaa...
2 comments:
i hate it when bloggers pepper their thoughts generously with vulgarities. sounds so uneducated...what a pity...soo not meletupszz!
Dear anonymous..this is the beauty of blogging. it is both a private and a public domain. but don't get mistaken. public does not mean i am catering my commentaries to the public. it is a diary of oneself that the public chooses to read. As in the same goes with the self-censorship of whether to watch porn movies or not, it is ultimately one's prerogative. If you feel offended or feel at unease with the profane language being used, then you shouldn't even read in the first place. And if you have a good cognitive skills, you would deduce that although i don't exercise a verbal rant, it is simply the mind that wants to speak. Apparently you failed to read my previous posts where the words of my language skills are painted in its full profound glory. It's multi-dimensional buddy. I will not delete your comment. In fact i love it. It is only apt that my anger is etched with the very essence of the latest topic - Resentment. It means to abhor and have averse reaction to something. And being uneducated is someone who did not complete primary school or have never gone to school. Use the word with tact and caution. I am specializing in two fields of studies...are you? Thanks for dropping by.
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