Strong Enough

Just a heartbreakingly beautiful song by Stacie Oricco - Strong Enough.

As I rest against this cold hard wall, will you pass me by?
Will you criticize me as I sit and cry?
I had fought so hard and thought that all my battles had been won
Only to find the war has just begun

Chorus:
Is He not strong enough?
Is He not pure enough?
To break me, pour me out and start again?

Is He not brave enough?
To take one chance on me
Please can I have one chance to start again

Will my weakness for and hour or make me suffer for a lifetime?
Is there any way to be made whole again
If I'm healed, renewed and find forgiveness by the strength I've never had
Will my scars forever ruin all God's plans?

Chorus:
Is He not strong enough?
Is He not pure enough?
To break me, pour me out and start again?

Is He not brave enough?
To take one chance on me
Please can I have one chance to start again

He took my life into His hands
And turned it all around
In my most desperate circumstance,
is where I'm finally found

That You are strong enough
That You are pure enough
To break me, pour me out and start again
That You are brave enough
To take one chance on me,
Oh thank You for my chance to start again

It's ironic how some songs inadvertently becomes a reflection of your love & life's situation. This song came out of nowhere and i find meaning and warmth in its hauntingly beautiful melody and powerful lyrics. I am struggling to move ahead with the times and at the same time, trying to move on and getting my life back on track. I have been cradled in fantasies, daydreams and an alternate world where i thought it would be a perpetually blissful affair. God, was i wrong.

I am learning from falling. And i am finding my strength through failures and trying times. I don't wish to look back. I find truth in the adage of how is one able to succeed in moving on if he is unwilling to let go of the past.

As for my love relationships, i know closures are so hard to do and trying to make yourself obliterate the one you love from your mind is one big obstacle you have to overcome. There can be no room for anyone else if you don't ask the person to step away and negate his/her existance. If the spark has dissipated and the chemistry has no more formulas in salvaging the relationship, it would be better to let your other half go.

I need to adhere to the advice of if you truly love someone who in return does not reciprocate your love, then set them free from the golden cage and let them find their own happiness.
It would be wise to invest my time, love and attention to someone else who is much more deserving of my company.

I have also learned that sometimes, we cannot wait for fate and destiny to guide our lives and lead us to wherever it chooses to go. If we can make that change today ourselves, then seize the moment and shape our own future. Because sitting and waiting for things to happen is as good as praying for miracles to happen.

The sun will shine after the hurricane. Things will probably never be the same. The glory is not in winning everytime, but how many times we picked ourselves up from failing in trying to win. This song goes out to my heroes out there who are survivors in their own rights.

As for me, i am picking up the pieces and discovering the strengths in my weaknesses. I am still crying over the lost love but i will get better in time. I know can do this. I will overcome. I will finish the race. I am Strong Enough.

Wassalam.

(I have never blamed you for walking out on me. I have been selfish in keeping you here to satiate my own hunger for company and happiness. I have realized my mistake. I did not think of your freedom and liberty in deciding for your own rights. I sincerely apologize. I will always treasure the spectacular moments, the laughters and joys, the hardships both of us had to go through and the special times we shared. I wish you well for the future and may you find someone who would treat you better than i ever did. I will fade away before both of us know it. I have never wished for spoken gratitude and obligatory appreciation for my sacrifices thus far. Plus, you know i will go the distance and putting you first above all, and also in providing the best for you, just so you would keep that smile on your face. All i ever wanted in return was respect and kindness. However, I have no regrets falling in love with you. You appeared when i wasn't looking. It certainly has been an amazing experience. But let's make this decision for ourselves in parting ways. It hurts me so facing whatever challenges you put me through, but i will take the bullets like a real man. Deep in my heart i still care for you, but for the sake of establishing a new life and a new chapter, let's close this book of love and keep it away for remembrance. Every minute on this adventurous joyride has been worthwhile. Thank you for everything. Take care, H.)